Moonlight's Embrace (A Skyrim Fanfic) (ORIGINAL)

Hard Answers

Note: Most of the words used in this chapter are nearly identical to the game's dialogue.

Dedicated to @We_Are_Dreamyn for keeping up with my story!

WBE: 2,292
WAE: 5,020

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((27th of Frostfall, six days after the crypt, 4E 202))

When I finally came to for the first time, my whole body ached and burned. Is this a Daedric realm? I wondered absently, unable to think straight. There was one thing in my mind, a face... a strong jaw, long red hair constantly left unbrushed and wild. Disappointment, joy, and unease all in pine-green eyes that stared with a plea. It became more vivid the longer I remained trapped between unconsciousness and reality.

"Russet, you can't do this." The sad voice of my Shield-Sister made my chest ache. I shut away my emotions and looked back up at Aela with determination. She was my forebear and one of my dearest friends. Next to her stood Vilkas and Farkas, the wolf twins watching me like kicked puppies. The metaphor was all too appropriate, but it was the sorrowful understanding of Kodlak Whitemane that made me shed a tear.

"Russet must find herself and who she is," he rumbled. "If she feels she no longer belongs with us, then we must let her find where she does... on her own." The way he said it spread my guilt even further. It almost made me want to stay, but he was right. I needed to escape it all and discover what I was meant to do.

"She's abandoning us?" hissed Sansa as she crossed her arms. The blonde Nord woman was visibly hurt by my decision. "What about me?" She appeared to be searching for what to say. "You promised to help me, Russet. You promised to help me find my father." I swallowed, having forgotten my vow to her.

"And I will." I watched my friend earnestly, hoping she would believe in me. Somewhere inside of me, I knew she wouldn't. Sansa kept her strong blue eyes on mine for a moment longer, then slowly turned around and walked off.

"You can't lie to us, Russet. I'd thought you had the smallest bit of honor left... but I suppose I was wrong." Vilkas gave me a final sigh, not having any more words to say. He followed Sansa away alongside Ria and Athis. Skjor was nowhere to be seen, and his absence somehow hurt.

Aela spoke again, finally accepting my choice. "I know I cannot stop you, blood-sister. If you want to leave us, then I won't stop you."

"No, no!" I exclaimed, desperately trying to convey my intentions. "I'm not leaving you..." I began to stammer. "I-I'm just..." I searched frantically for the words to say. "It's like Kodlak said. I'm leaving to find myself, to find what I need."

"Why can't we give that to you?" Farkas' voice was rough as he spoke up for the first time since my declaration. "We help the people of Skyrim. We're brave, we're your family." He may not have been as intelligent as his brother, but he was well aware of what I was doing. More than the others, most likely. He'd always been different, always known what I was thinking even when I wasn't open.

"Farkas..." I felt helpless to deny the younger brother's imploring sky-blue eyes.

"Would it help if I came with you? If I brought you to the provinces, to Cyrodil and Morrowind?" He sounded so hopeful, looking down at me with such desperation I could hardly bear it. To me, he was a little dog begging me not to leave the house.

"I can't let you," I choked out. "This is my journey and mine alone." I watched as his faith in me withered away almost to nothing. "I'm sorry." My whisper meant little to him.

"No, you're not," Aela argued, and I nearly started an argument. At this point, an altercation would be useless and only delay the inevitable.