Young Queen

ONE

"How are you feeling today, Aria?"

Her question pulled me out of the current daze I was under while staring at the ticking clock on the wall.

"I feel better," I told her. It was the partial truth, but I was feeling much better than I did a month ago.

"How are your online classes going? Your mom told me you are still pulling good grades." I knew she was trying to get me to open up before she got into the serious things that she was paid to help me with, but it didn't make it any easier to remember.

I nodded my head at her comment, "My classes are fine."

"How are your friends? Do you still see them often?"

I played with the hem of the pink corduroy skirt I was wearing. "They're doing good; we still get brunch on Saturdays." Oh my friends, well they are less traumatized than I am if that counts for anything.

"So then I'm sure they would help make the transition back to school a little easier for you," she said, and I picked up on the hopeful tone of her voice.

Oh yes, the dreaded place I would be forced to return to since everyone believed that my current mental state was significantly better than it was before. The only problem was that there was one person that wouldn't be returning to that school.

"I'm sure they will."

"You're mother also told me that Moretti," she looked down at her notes, "was recovering nicely."

"Steven? Yes, he's better." Of course, he had only woken up from his coma a week ago, before he and Sofia left for Italy. The thought of the two of them brought up moments that I couldn't handle replaying.

"Have you spoken to him?" She asked me. So this was her way of easing into the serious stuff.

I took a deep breath, "No, I haven't."

"Why not?"

She seriously asks the most ridiculous questions at times.

"Because it's too hard."

She put her notepad down, before leaning in closer to me on the chair. "You know you saved his life Aria."

"At what expense," my tone was venomous. "The man can barely walk, his own heart has to be monitored because it could give out at any second."

"While those things are true, he is still alive," her brown eyes stared me down. "Life is a beautiful thing, Aria."

"Unfortunate how some people don't have that gift to claim," I hissed at her, tears filling my eyes. I hated remembering. I hated thinking about that night, and all she ever did was force me to remember it.

"Aria, you did what you had to do. No one blames you," her voice was soft. No matter how many times during these sessions, I screamed and took my frustration out on her, she always kept a calm exterior.

"Then why do I blame myself?"

"You have a kind soul Aria. You care for people no matter how wrong they did you. You feel sympathy for people, even when they don't deserve it. You were put in a tough position, and you acted on that need to protect a loved one."

"How do I make the guilt go away?" I asked her. More like begged her.

"You have to consider the outcome of your actions, and how much more broken you would've felt had you not done what you did. You may not think so Aria, but what you did was the right decision, and I know a couple of people who will forever be thankful for what you did."