Damaged || Cody Simpson

37

Cody Simpson.

"Can we talk?" Said my dad as I walked into the kitchen the next day. Dark rings were stained under my eyes, I couldn't get any sleep. I was up all night sneezing, no doubt Bella was too.

"Sure." I quietly said, taking a bottle of water out of the fridge. "What about?"
He pulled out a seat and sat down, looking towards the one opposite him, wanting me to, as well.

"Well, everything really." He said as I sat opposite him, looking just as curious as he did confused. "I just want to know.. Why."

"This isn't about just anything is it?" I asked, twisting off the bottle cap and taking a small sip of it. "It's about what I told you. If you've come to shout at me, get it over with. I already have a headache."

"No, no I haven't come to shout at you. " He said, catching me slightly off guard. "I said some things yesterday that were way out of line.. I mean, way out of line." He bit his lip.

"And you want to say sorry?" I asked.

"I just want to talk about it.. I want to know why." He awkwardly started to tap his fingers against the table.

"Well it wasn't intentional, dad." I quietly said, my hands still wrapped around the cold bottle. "I was really drunk, I mean, I know that's no excuse.. But I.. I mean.. I don't know, do we have to talk about this?" My cheeks started to heat as I bit my lip.

"Yes, Cody, we have to talk about this." He awkwardly responded. "It's a big thing, do you realize how much emotional stress something like that can put on your mind? And it's happened twice now, what with Scarlet.. And now.."

"Don't mention Scarlet." I harshly responded, lifting my head up. "Okay? It hurts to think about. Just.. Don't."

"See? This is what I mean, Cody. I'm worried about you." He started and my head fell back slightly, laughter escaping my lips. "What's so funny about that?"
"Because." I chuckled, crossing my arms as I slouched in my chair. "You never worry about me. You just do what you think is best for me because mom thinks it is."

"That's not true and you know it." He said.

"Isn't it?" I asked, my eyes leaving the table as I looked straight towards my dad. "So, you're telling me that it was your idea to give me counselling? Remember that time I was in that hospital for a week? That wasn't your idea to take me in, it was moms. Anything that comes from your mouth is originally moms idea, don't try and hide it because I know. I wouldn't be surprised if this conversation was moms idea, either."

"Cody.. " He sighed, his eyes trailing down towards the table, but he suddenly paused, looking slightly caught off guard and for a moment, I didn't know what he was looking at. "What's wrong with your arm? Tell me the truth this time, don't say you fell."

My mouth opened, but soon shut when I had nothing to say.

"I thought everything about that had stopped?" He asked when I didn't respond and my head fell. "Isn't that the point of your counselling?"

"See, you don't understand anything about this." I sarcastically laughed, pushing my chair back and standing up. "It's not as easy as that, dad. I can't just stop and never start again, nothing works that way."

"You need help, Cody. Better help." He violently hit the table with the palms of his hands and pushed his chair back, standing up along with me. "Look at you, you're not doing okay. Better help would benefit you."

"Stop it!" I shouted, turning around, anger getting the best of me. "Look at you, dad! Don't you see what you're doing? You think buying your way around this situation is going to make me better, but it's not! I'm not right in the mind, dad! I'm crazy! Nothing can fix me and that's just it. I'm going to have days where I'm going to be sad and not want to get out of bed and I think I'm never going to get better, but the whole point of me having this illness is the fact that I'm supposed to have parents like you and mom to help me through it, but the saddest part of all is that I don't, because you're never there for me. The only person I have is my girlfriend, she's the only person who cares!"