So Close (Camren)

20 - Can I Be Close To You? (Part 1)

a/n: what up, cute stuff? the song rec for this chapter is Bloom by The Paper Kites. happy reading!! hearts!

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Lauren is attracted to Camila. That much the taller girl is certain of. She knows herself enough to recognize the usual signs that she is attracted to someone. For one, she feels drawn to the girl's scent which is weird, she knows. And another thing is that Lauren hasn't been spared from falling captive in the way Camila's eyes look when the sun shines on them just right.

Hell, it almost makes Lauren sick from how undeniably attracted she is to the smaller brunette.

But as far as certainty goes, that's where it ends for Lauren. Attracted? Sure. But the word feels too small for whatever the fuck Lauren is feeling. Because she knows she feels more.

Everyday she wakes up and sees the smaller girl sleeping on her own bed across the cabin and Lauren could almost feel herself gravitate towards the girl.

She feels it in her bones - how hard she's fighting the urge to just let go and let herself be as close as she can get to the girl.

Because Lauren can't shake off how he heart keeps telling her that being with Camila will be exactly like what coming home feels like.

But she has one tiny problem: she doesn't know if Camila's gay. Or if Camila likes girls, to say the least. Sure, the smaller girl seems like she's flirting with Lauren occasionally (like that one time she called Lauren 'daddy') but that doesn't really confirm anything for the taller girl.

Lauren looks at Camila who's too busy typing away on her laptop to notice the taller girl's stare.

The taller girl thinks it over before making a mental list of the things she knows about Camila that might help her know if the smaller girl could actually possibly be gay.

1. She's got pictures with a taller looking girl up on her side of the cabin.

"Okay, that could either be her cousin, her best friend, or God forbid, her girlfriend." Lauren thinks to herself, absentmindedly biting her lip as she continued making her mental list.

2. She keeps her nails short.

"Maybe she's just really hygienic and doesn't want to accidentally scratch herself or anyone else?" A small voice in Lauren's head argues. Lauren sighs and thinks of the final point she can identify at the moment.

3. The guy she was talking to in the cafeteria - Shewbert? Sherman? Shawn?

"God, I'm so bad at names. But Camila looked fairly interested in what he has to say to her even if he was obviously just trying to get into her pants. Or maybe she was just being polite?" Lauren huffs in confusion, her train of thoughts leading her to no concrete conclusion as to whether or not the girl she's painfully attracted could actually possibly like her back or not.

"You okay?" Camila's voice interrupts Lauren's internal turmoil.

"Uh, yeah. Why?" Lauren bites on her inner cheek.

Camila hesitates for a moment before choosing to let it go.

"Nothing, nevermind." Camila shrugs before trying to focus on what she was writing.

"Are... you okay?" Lauren asks tentatively.

"Hmm? I mean, y-yeah!"

"Are you busy?"

"N-Not really! Why? Got something on your mind?" Camila says as she closes her laptop to give Lauren her full attention.

"Oh, nothing. I was just, um, bored I guess. What were you doing anyway? I mean, if I may ask."

"I was just writing... something."

"Ooooh, you write? Can I see? I-I mean, if it's alright." Lauren asks with her interest piqued.

"I-It's just a... hobby! Yeah! Definitely a hobby. But... yeah, sure! Why not!" Camila says as she pats the space next to her, signalling for Lauren to come over."

"That's cool! You know I sorta write too... Wouldn't it be cool if we wrote and sang together?!" Lauren says excitedly as she carefully puts her guitar on top of her bed.

"Mmm... I doubt I can perform as good as you."

"Flattery will get you nowhere, Camz." Lauren teases as she sits next to Camila, their forearms slightly touching.

"Like a charm! B-But anyway, here." Camila passes her laptop to Lauren, with her rough draft pulled up on the screen.

"You don't have to read through everything if you don't like it! I-It's a rou-"

"Shh, I'm about to read a masterpiece. I need silence." Lauren, with her eyes focused on the laptop screen and her brow slightly creased, shushes Camila who contemplated on protesting against the taller girl before four sharp knocks, that almost sounded like a beat from a song, rang through their cabin door. Lauren shoots Camila an inquisitive gaze and the smaller girl just shrugs.

"Were you expecting anybody?" Lauren asks, already imagining the worst case scenario which involves Cronk or Prawn or Shawn or whatever his name is, leaning against the doorframe, asking for Camila.

The smaller brunette shakes her head before saying, "Maybe it's Chelsea?"

"Why would Chelsea walk up all the way to our cabin?"

"I don't know! Don't you think we should just -"

Camila is cut off when an all too familiar voice calls for her through the door.

"Chancho! You there?!"

Lauren watches as a huge grin finds its way to Camila's lips.

"Cheechee!" Camila squeals before practically flying from her bed to answer the door.

The smaller brunette swings it open and Lauren sees Camila jump into the arms of the same girl who's in the pictures on Camila's wall. The taller girl spins Camila around and they both look so happy to be together.

Happy enough to not notice Lauren, sitting on Camila's bed, looking oh so jealous.

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a/n: oooooh a jealous Lauren, huh? what do you guys think? anyway, i hope you've been taking care of yourselves! thank you so much for reading through this chapter. may we meet again, sunshines! hearts!