Idols|| Felix Lee✔

Chapter 51: Hesitations

Felix sighs as he struggles to find his way back to the world he has come to know. He wanders quite subconsciously, thinking back on the argument that transpired. Sure, there were some arguments in the past, but none like this. And honestly, he wish he could take back some words.

To be quite frank, from an author's perspective, both of them were in the wrong. Now, now, hear me out. Although there are more pros than cons weighing on Reina's side of this discussion, she was still in the wrong. Even though she and Felix are together, there comes a time where you will have quite a lot of disagreements on matters.

She had a choice, to suck up the hurt and set aside the differences. She had a choice, to show him, fully that she was hurt by his words and demand that things be worked out in an instant, but what did she do? She forced him to go. Forced herself to wallow over the sea of sorrow, and that was were she went wrong.

Although she was hurt, she decided to sit around in her hurt. She didn't try to think anything through with Felix. I mean, you could disagree with me and blame everything on Felix, but arguments are usually both ends in the wrong. One is just more right than the other.

Both Reina and Felix had let their emotions get the best of them, Felix was just more evident. Like author has mentioned before, Reina isn't the best at expressing her feelings. It has always been Felix. He always knew the right words to say and the right things to do. Reina, however, does not. She thinks irrationally when it comes to expression of emotions.

And therefore, when she snaps, it's usually out of anger or frustration, because she doesn't know how to get any of the other emotions out.

Felix, however, had more cons than pros weighing on his side. He let his emotions get the best of him, and being the stubborn person he is, he wanted to feel right. He knew, once she told him that they didn't know Ava, but wasn't going to help him, he had lost, but he was set on trying to be right that he pressed on and on.

He let his pride get the best of him, and said some stuff that shouldn't have been said. Unlike him, though, Reina was once told, that the things said out of anger, are the things that are thought about the most. So, Reina now thinks that, if they were ever in a situation where Felix had to give up his music, he'd give her up instead.

A lot of people in such a situation would think that's being dumb. You're seriously giving up music for love? But here's where they don't understand it. Music, and the dream of working with music has been around way longer than the emotion of love has. When someone chooses to give up their lifelong dream for an emotion, it's usually romantic and amazing, but in all honesty, it's not.

They're choosing someone they've met along the way, over something they've been dreaming of, for as long as they can remember. And, sometimes, they can never get that chance back. Other times, you have to try and focus on something entirely new. And even if your experience wasn't the best, you'll still yearn for your dream. And that's something both Felix and Reina doesn't get.

Felix, would give up Stray Kids in a heartbeat, if it meant being with Reina. And so would Reina. But let's just said that, that had to happen. They already have such strong bonds and ties with their group members, and even some staff in that industry. If they were to throw it all away, those knots and bonds would slowly be torn apart. They won't have the same time set as their group members anymore.

They wouldn't be able to meet them on a regular basis anymore, and will, therefore slowly begin to lose their friends. Anyways, like I said, both of them are in the wrong, done deal.

(Sorry for the little intervene. I just had to get something across)

This argument wasn't as mild as the others were. It was playful and meaningless. This carried great emotions, hurt pain, suffering. And, if they chose to be together, they had to work something out, and fast.

But, Felix, didn't know what to do. He wanted to make up with Reina as fast as possible, but he didn't know whether to go now, or wait a while. He was hesitant to fix it, you know?

He was scared that, if he were to go now, she'd still be angry, and it'll hurt more now, than it did before. And Felix wasn't ready for that. He wasn't ready for them to be torn apart. And he didn't want them to, not ever.

But, what she did was dumb. All those times of him being scolded for wearing the same color. And now that he felt the need to objectify the same principle to her, since she did act a certain way in a public setting, they're not talking.

So, he stopped, and began to weigh out the good and bad, of going back to her and fixing it.

It took him a while, but in the end, he decided. And as he turned around to go back and make things right, he was tackled. Sobs were the only thing he heard as the person hugged him tightly, repeatedly saying I'm sorry as they embraced him.

His eyes widened in shock, but softened, as he wrapped his arms around the love of his life, shushing her softly and telling her that it was his fault instead of.
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What's good mami? What did you think about this chapter?

Writers block suddenly shifted away from me and it took me half an hour to do this, I AM PROUD OF MYSELF.

Love you guyssssssss🥺💕

Lots of Love,
~Reina (레이나)

10.07.2019
|| Word Count: 970 words||