Problems of an Invisible Girl

Chapter 37

After Rina went into the bathroom to wash off the blood, the others started fussing around Jack. Seeing that there was nothing she could do to help, Serena went outside to take a breath of fresh air.
She could no longer stand the stench of blood mixed with the smell of fear that permeated every corner of the room.
As she went outside, she could feel a lump forming in her throat and rage burning through her whole body.

Those horrible people shot at the father that she didn't even get the chance to know yet. They wanted to destroy any possibility of her getting to know him better.
She couldn't help but wonder what she ever did for so many bad things to keep happening to her.
Maybe she wasn't always the nicest person to everyone, but that was the result of her need to protect herself, she meant them no harm.

When she was smaller she was openhearted towards every potential adoptive family and that only brought her pain and heartache.
One day when she failed to be adopted into a family that she really wanted to become a member of, mostly because it would mean she would have a sister, she decided to turn a new leaf.
She shut herself off to feeling anything towards all those different people who came by to adopt children. If she was being honest with herself she shut off from everyone and everything.
That was until she met Nat.

He was the only one who ever managed to break through her defenses just by being his awesome self.
Even he had a lot of troubles breaking down her walls but here she was now her walls down and more vulnerable than she ever wanted to be.

If her father's condition were to deteriorate, she had no idea what she would do.
How much would it hurt if either of them were to die?
That was the terrible thing about caring for other people, if something were to happen to them she would feel crushed and that was the pain that she opened herself up to.

Sitting there, after everything that happened, listening in for any signs of panic, of her father's condition worsening she couldn't help but wonder if she had made the right choice if she had even made a choice.
It felt to her like her heart had already made the decision on its own, without ever even consulting her brain.
That terrified her more than anything in her life ever did.

As the panic was starting to settle in, she could see someone approaching her, and she didn't have to look up to know it was Nat.
After all, he was the one who always seemed to have the uncanny ability to sense when she needed him the most.
As long as she could remember, he was always her rock in times of trouble, and she was happy that he was once more by her side, happy that he had found her.
It was selfish to be happy that he was in such a dangerous situation with her, but she was.
She was happy that she would have Nat's voice of reason and wisdom that people rarely expected in someone his age.

"He'll be fine. It's just a flesh wound." Nat said trying to comfort her.
"You sound like a bad action movie." She answered.
She tried to make her tone joking, but she failed miserably since her voice was weak and it broke at the end of the sentence.
"It's not my fault. It's the truth." Nat said.
He was trying to put up a calm front although he felt anything but calm.

Yes, he was telling the truth, her father's wound wasn't serious, but they were still in grave danger, and he wasn't sure that he would be able to get them out of the trouble they were in.
It rubbed him the wrong way that the adults seemed to be completely useless when they needed them the most and that he had to be the mastermind behind their salvation.
Playing detective or spy or whatever was fun when it wasn't real. Now that he was faced with all the dangers in real life his confidence started dwindling.

"I know. I am just afraid. He might die, if not from this wound then maybe from the next one." She said barely containing her sobs.
Not having anything comforting to say, Nat hugged her tightly wishing he had all the answers for her.
They sat like that, his hand wrapped around her shoulders for some time as Serena tried to compose herself enough to go back inside.

While they sat there, Serena started remembering the first time she went to cry on his shoulder when yet another family decided no thank you, they wouldn't take a troubled kid.
When she climbed up the tree next to his window and knocked on it, it was raining like crazy.

It was the worst thunderstorm their city had ever experienced, and she had no idea how she even managed to climb the wet tree in the dark but when Nat raised his head upon hearing the knock there she was staring at him through the window.
He quickly opened the window and let her in.

She could still clearly remember being soaking wet and shivering from the cold, not knowing how she even arrived at the house Nat was leaving at the time.

As soon as she stepped in he wrapped a warm blanket around her and offered her some of his clothes which she refused because all she needed was for him to be there for her, to understand her.

"They decided that I was too much trouble for them, that I was too old." She said sniffling.
As Nat knew that there was nothing that he could say to make her feel better, no truth left to be said, instead of lying to her and saying everything would be okay, which he couldn't guarantee, he hugged her tightly.
Some water she was drenched in seeped through to him but still, he held on to her. Even after her tears started pouring down on his shoulder, he held on.
Serena realized than that it was no wonder that she saw him as her big brother. He was protective, fearless and gentle depending on what she needed in the given moment.

Soon enough she wiggled out of his hug, having finally cried out all the tears she had, violently shivering.
"Maybe you are right. Can you give me some clothes to change into." Serena asked him.
"Sure. While you do that I'll put on the best horror movie that I can find, and we'll have a movie night." He said.
"You hate horror movies," Serena said.
"Yes, but you love them," Nat said.
After that, she went to the bathroom to change and when she came back, they sat down on the couch to watch the movies together.

It felt to her like Nat had the uncanny ability to read her mind because watching a horror movie was exactly what she needed.
She needed the escape from reality but another reason she loved watching them was that the violence and bloodshed in them was a type of release for her pant up anger.
Since she couldn't very well scream and break things, seeing someone else releasing anger was therapeutic for her although she had a feeling that it was a weird thing to do.

Although she had never explained all that to Nat, he seemed to understand because he was ready to watch those types of movies even though he was mostly covering his eyes and averting his gaze.

With an effort, Serena made her mind come back to the present although the past seemed like a much safer moment for the time being.
"What are we going to do now?" She whispered to Nat.
He broke the hug and started contemplating her question.
"We need a place far away, off the grid." He said.
"This isn't a movie, we can't just find the perfect place by accident," Serena said.
"I know but it is something to think about," Nat said.
"We need a place where there is little or no technology and where there aren't many people around," Nat added.

"Wait a minute! I think I might have an idea!" Serena said.
"I remember Rina mentioning something about being sad that she couldn't get in contact with her grandma, or great-grandma because she was off the grid.
If I remember correctly, I think she said that the woman lived isolated from others and didn't have the internet or even the phone." Serena said.

"That sounds like it might be a perfect place for us. Let's go talk with Rina if she remembers where exactly it is." He said.

They went inside with a grain of hope that maybe, just maybe, they would find a safe place for them to recuperate or even stay at.