Chapter 45

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What happened? That question kept ringing around inside of my head, drowning out everything else.

Killian remained kneeling in front of me. He was looking at me as if I were an alien, as if he didn't even recognise me anymore.

What did I do?

"Killian, please, tell me what happened!" I pleaded desperately with him. Unable to last any longer with out knowing, without having answers.

"You-you, I-I don't know how you did it but..." He swallowed and glanced away from me.

Moving closer towards him I said gently,

"I what, Killian?"

"You were inside of my head!" He said, eyes wide.

My throat constricted, I could feel the blood drain from my body.

"I-I, I couldn't have been!"

"You were, I saw-I saw, what you were thinking about or remembering and-and, it was...By the Moon Goddess, it was terrifying and so real! It was almost as if I could feel your pain! Queen Luna I didn't know you went through that! Please can you forgive me for calling yo-"

"Killian, stop, just stop." My mind was reeling.

Non of this makes any sense. It's impossible for him to have seen what I was thinking let alone feel my pain.

My God.

Xavier.

If Killian was somehow able to see and feel what I was seeing and feeling that means...

Oh gods, that means, so did Xavier and I bet he felt it ten times over. He would never be able to handle seeing me in that kind of state.

I felt my face completely drain of colour. My heart beat picked up and it continued to beat faster and faster the more the reality of the situation set in.

I never wanted him to fully know the extent of what I went through because I know he would spiral out of control and I did the exact opposite, I basically projected it right in front of him! How could I let something like that happen? How could I loose control?

I never really divulged into any details of what I had been through because it was and still is an extremely dark part of my life and I didn't want to think about it or deal with it and I guess that was a huge mistake because I was scared and immediately my memories came back and made everything infinitely more worse.

I couldn't seem to focus. There were so many thoughts running through my mind. It was hard to keep up.

"Killian where is Xavier." I asked, trying desperately to figure everything out and fit all the pieces of this puzzle  into place.

"I don't know, after you shared your memories with us, I was extremely confused as to what was happening and then I couldn't breath and I just managed to look up and I saw Alpha, he looked completely distraught. I saw him look at you and then he-he just disappeared."

Disappeared, no one just disappears into thin air. He must be somewhere, maybe he went to cool down somewhere or collect his thoughts?

By the Moon Goddess, I don't know! 

"Did you see which direction he went?"

Killian just looked at me and shook his head. His new behaviour towards me was throwing me off. I wasn't used to him being so of kilter and actually someone who I can talk to without feeling like I'm beneath him. He was actually treating me how the Queen Luna should be treated, with respect.

How could a few memories change his perspective so quickly? Was it really that vivid and well bad?! If Killian is looking at me with pity, I don't even want to imagine what kind of state Xavier  must be in right now.

I have to find him and I have to speak to him, right now, it can't wait! I don't care about the whole weird mind invasion or whatever the heck is wrong with Killian, the only thing that mattered right now is Xavier.

"Killian can you try to mind link him?" I tried mind linking him but there was just an emptiness, a darkness. Nothing, absolutely nothing.

Killian squinted his eyes for a moment then said confused,

"I tried but it's a dead end. His mind is closed of to everyone in the pack."

What is going on with him?!

Let's go back to the castle and see if anyone has seen him. Killian quickly got up, perhaps he saw the alarm in my eyes, or he knew this wasn't typical Xavier behaviour. We both knew it wasn't. Something was seriously wrong.

As soon as we arrived at the castle it was pretty clear that something definitely happened here to because the stench of chaos hung heavily in the air.

Everyone was rushing about and in a flurry. The foyer was completely trashed, the furniture was upturned, glass littered the floors but what stood out most to me were the deep and long claw marks on the wall.

I could practically see Xavier in his rage, his blue eyes blinding, slashing the wall, his claws elongated.

I was watching the chaos all around me when someone at a distance called out,

"Queen Luna!"

I snapped out of my daze and looked to where the voice was coming from. One of Xavier's generals came towards me in a rush.

"Queen Luna! Where have you been?"

"Ah...I-I, wa-"

"His Highness, completely lost it! He trashed the place! No one could calm him down!"

"Wait, when did he do all of this?" I asked, gesturing towards the mess.

"About twenty five minutes ago! He came storming out of his office and then suddenly the foyer was trashed and then he dashed out the front door and into the woods."

Twenty five minutes ago, that means he was in a rage when he left the house and before he found Killian and I. So he was angry before he saw us, but at what?

Why was he so angry that he had to lash out in temper like this?

I thought he was mad because he saw Killian and I in an intimate position, if you could even call it that.

"But- but that doesn't make any sense! Are you sure it was that long ago and have you seen him since?"

"Yes, Luna and no. Why, where is His Highness?" The general looked at me confused and I couldn't help but feel more confused than ever.

I felt some one touch my arm and I jolted back slightly. I turned to my side and noticed Killian was still besides me. I had almost forgotten about him.

"Luna, there is something I have to tell you, in private."

"Killian, can it not wait? We have more important issues at hand like the King being missing." I said impatiently and was about to turn away from him again when he said urgently,

"No, it is important, I think I know why he left in a rage to come and find us."

What, how would he know?

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Firstly thank you to all my readers we have reached 100k and I am so happy!

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