Sage
Even as my 4pm class is dismissed, I can't think clearly. The ocean of glowing hearts should have been a good diversion, but as I hoist my black backpack over my shoulders, my mind is still clouded with memories of what happened this morning.
"Guys, I fucked up."
"I have a plight and nobody is offering their help!"
"You realize how pathetic I feel right now?"
"I'm going to die before the week is over anyway."
Why am I so bothered by someone else's problem? I made a vow to myself that I will try not to barge into other people's business. Getting involved will only complicate my life. I don't want any part of this. I'm not going to--
"If I don't fork up the dough in two days, she'll send her minions to give me a beating."
"Fine! Abandon a friend in need!"
The last time I tried to help someone..it didn't end well.
But maybe--No.
Just--Stop it, Sage!
What if I--
"Hey,Sage!" calls one of my classmates, Mei, short for Meagan. The pronunciation annoys her, so she settles for Mai.
I smile at the pretty half-Japanese 17-year old. She's wearing a plain shirt, cardigan, skirt, and flats--all in different shades of violet. On someone else, it might be an eyesore, but with Mai's looks, it suits her perfectly.
Mei returns my smile. "We're all heading to the new doughnut shop! Want to come along?"
My mind and heart are saying 'No' but my stomach is saying 'Yes!'. Besides, I don't want to upset Mai's friends--two hearts are glowing weak red (mild annoyance) while the other three are glowing a pale purple (slight nervousness).
"Yeah!" I say,joining the group filing out of the classroom. I steal a discreet glance at everyone's chest--their hearts are glowing pale pink (calm). I quickly look away before I seem like a pervert.
Thank goodness we spend only thirty minutes at California Doughnuts. Some of the girls live in a rather far distance, so they need to get home before the sky grows dark. I bid Mai and the group goodbye when we reach the bus stop.
I didn't even eat anything because I'm wearing a mask and I don't want to show my face to anyone. Nobody minded,though. All they did was engage in small talk in between sips of coffee. Why did they even suggest the doughnut place if they weren't going to buy doughnuts?
I glance to my right, catching my reflection in a store window. I hurriedly avert my gaze when I notice how unkempt I look. My heart jumps when I realize where I'm standing in front of: A Lotto Shop. The small space is teeming with adults, teenagers, and senior citizens, flailing their money in the air.
Once inside, I stare up at the neon board of Prize Listings. 15 Grand...30 Grand...My eyes travel upward. 50 Grand...90 million dollars...I'll aim for 10 million. That's what the girl named Knox needs, right? I have to pray and use whatever luck I'm allowed to have.
My stomach gives a lurch of anticipation as I pay for ten tickets. I bite my lip, wondering if I should broaden my horizons. At the last minute, I make an additional order of forty more tickets, much to the amusement of the thirty-something guy behind the counter.
No need to feel guilty,I tell myself firmly. It's my money. I earn a pretty good salary each month. If I want to participate in the lottery, I can splurge on however many tickets I please.
Quite a number of heads turn in my direction when I grab the extra forty cards. On instinct, I clutch the vertically rectangular tickets to my chest protectively, a twinge of propriety twisting my nerves. The possessive feeling intensified when I glimpse the hearts of the adults surrounding me. They are glowing green (envy) and black (bad/evil intentions).
Under my medical mask, I nervously grit my teeth before I take calm steps out of the store. I can feel my right eyelid twitching so I slap a palm over it to stop the movement.
Relax, Sage, I order myself. Just breathe in...breathe out.
The minute I'm inside my small one-story house, I frantically lock the door and lean my back against it, then breathe as if I haven't breathed for a long time.
"Meow."
I smile when I hear him greet me. And then..
"Meow." "Meow." Meow." "Meow." "Meow." "Meow."
Seven cats pad over towards me. Five of them drape over my ankles, the sixth jumps onto my right shoulder while the seventh automatically falls asleep at my feet.
All of them are male, and they're all named after...
I smile sheepishly to myself.
"Kim Namjoon, Kim Seokjin, Min Yoongi, Jung Hoseok, Park Jimin, Kim Taehyung, Jeon Jungkook. I bet you're all hungry," I say, beaming down at them as I start walking into the small kitchen area. Even as I move forward, the youngest cat sleeping over my right foot doesn't stir.
Oh,Kookie. What am I going to do with you?
Two minutes later, I've set down seven bowls in one neat line on the tiled kitchen floor. Each bowl coordinates with the favorite colors of the real-life B.T.S. members. For RM,a mix of pink, black, and purple. For the eldest, white. For my sun/star/flower, and also my bias, green. For the mochi, blue and black. For CGV, grey. For Suga, white. And last but not the least, for the maknae, black.
My seven bangtan cats skitter to their assigned bowls and quietly--sort of--chow down. I squat a few feet away from them, smiling in satisfaction as the row of cats attack their tuna-flavored pebbles until the bowls are wiped clean.
It takes me twenty minutes to rinse the bowls spotless before I replace them in the proper cabinets. I don't have homework since it's only the first day but I do have to finish an episode and upload it on Line, the worldwide site for Webtoons.
I plop down on my beloved swivel chair, make myself comfortable, then pick up my gray stylus and state-of-the-art digital tablet supported by a small tablet-support-ramp.
This is how I make a stable income. I often win prize money from annual Webtoon Contests, and the regular pay is incredible. Thanks to Webtooning, I can pay for my life expenses--rent, food, water, electricity, and my daily allowance. I live practically, so I don't have trouble with my finances.
I don't want to be a burden to others.
Not anymore.
