Inside and Out | Seventeen Fanfiction

Young Love

Jun made several attempts to get Joshua out of his room, but it was no use.

Jeonghan really hit a soft spot in him.

Vernon knew about the incident too, since Seongcheol and Mingyu told him the situation. And Joshua knew that Vernon knew, via Minghao.

But Joshua refused to see his partner.

"Joshua, he doesn't hate you, come on out"

"No!" Joshua threw several books at the door, using the loud noise to spook his friend on the other side. Jun sighed.

Vernon placed a hand on Jun's shoulder and nodded. It was now his turn to make Joshua open the door, since they hadn't seen each other for almost a month.

"Joshua" Vernon said softly.

Joshua stiffened at the voice.

"Go away, Vernon"

"Why? Why are you shutting everyone out?"

"Because I don't want to see anybody" Joshua choked back some tears. He was so cold before, so why couldn't he be now?

"It's all your fault Vernon, you're the reason I've become...soft"

"There's nothing wrong with that Joshu-"

"It's Jisoo! Now leave me alone!"

Joshua heard Vernon's footsteps walk away from the door and he sighed. He really doesn't care...

He was about to walk over to his bed until he heard the sound of footsteps again, and a lock turning.

Shit. He's breaking in.

"VERNON! NO-"

Joshua was cut off by a tight hug, and he was honestly speechless. He saw Jun smiling at the doorway before he shut the door behind him, leaving Joshua and Vernon...alone.

"Get out, Vernon"

"No" he simply said. Joshua didn't feel like fighting anymore, he was weak.

Joshua buried his head into Vernon's shoulder, snuggling close to him. Vernon tightened his grip around Joshua's waist, making sure the older felt secure. He felt love all over again.

"Vernon..."

"Yes, Joshua?"

"Do you love me? And please tell the truth"

Vernon started to rub circles on Joshua's back soothingly, making the older feel more relaxed. He spoke softly.

"I love you more than anything in the world. I know you didn't receive affection growing up and you're new to this whole thing but I want you to feel the love you deserve to feel. I want you to trust me, Joshua..."

Joshua pulled away and looked into his lover's eyes, Vernon continued.

"And why would I lie to you about how I feel?"

Joshua smiled, "because everyone lies. Even the people you really trust". He looked down at his feet and placed his head back on Vernon's chest. Vernon stroked the back of Joshua's head in a comforting way, he felt the older sigh.

"Do you love me, Joshua?"

Without hesitation, Joshua pulled Vernon into a kiss. His hands stuck to Vernon's cheeks while Vernon still had his arms wrapped lovingly around his lover's waist. They stayed there for a while before both pulling away.

"I'll take that as a yes" Vernon chuckled, pecking Joshua's forehead. They hugged for a little while longer, since Joshua felt so secure and safe in Vernon's arms. But Vernon had to ruin that moment for him.

"Are you ready to go back downstairs to the others?"

Joshua glared at him with cold eyes, before shaking his head and frowning.

"Not if Jeonghan is down there"

"He's really sorry, Joshua. He didn't mean any harm, it was just in the heat of the moment. You two can't have tension between each other forever"

"I can live with it..." Joshua sighed. "I've lived with this bullshit for most of my life". Joshua sat on his bed and sighed louder than before.

"It's just because of who I was before, it makes others feel afraid. I guess I didn't realise it until now how the others truly felt about me..."

Vernon went to sit next to Joshua, neither of them looked at each other. They just spoke, and listened to one another.

"And when Jeonghan make me question whether you even loved me or not, it make me question a lot of things. I thought you changed me so I could stop scaring the others, and you loved me out of pity"

"Well, that certainly isn't true. I knew you were shutting a lot of things in there, and they needed to be let out. You're not a horrible person, you've just had a lot of hard times to push through. And you were brave to tell us how you felt"

Joshua leant against Vernon's shoulder, he felt more tears falling down his cheeks. Vernon held his hand in reassurance.

"You're not a monster. You are loved and very much wanted here. Remember that"
Vernon then repositioned himself and pulled Joshua in for another hug. He'd never seen Joshua cry so hard before, and it became difficult for him to hold back tears too.
The bedroom door creaked open and several heads peeped through the entrance and saw the scene before them.

Seokmin, Jun and Minghao walked over and wrapped their arms around the couple, creating another group hug. Member after member came in, even Jeonghan.

"You are loved, and you are wanted"