The Secrets Hidden Within The Dairies Of The Nations

A Faded Painting And Years Worth Of Self Blame

Tears slipped down Alfred's cheeks as he stared at the old painting. The painting was of his mother and she was holding him and Matthew when they were only babies. Where did Matthew get this? And why did he never tell him about it? He gently flipped the painting over and saw old faint writing. He wiped at his eyes as he read what it said. 

My darling children how I love you so. I know you'll both grow into strong young men and I wish I could be there for it but that is simply not fate's design. I will fade one day and I will no longer be there for you my children but I pray to the spirits that you will both find someone to love and cherish you just as much as I do. Though our time together will be short I will make every moment of it count. Oh my precious babies never forget that I will always love you.

Alfred's tears fell harder as he gently held the painting close to his heart. He barely registered Gilbert pulling him into a hug. He broke down and sobbed into the Prussian's chest, and Gilbert just gently rocked him back and forth while he hummed softly. 

"Why would Mattie keep this a secret from me?" Alfred managed to say through his sobs and Gilbert could do nothing but continue to comfort the broken American. 

"I don't know Alfie" He said softly which only made Alfred cry even harder. 

"I miss her so much" He sobbed breaking Gilbert's heart, he hated seeing Alfred cry it always made him want to cry as well. 

"I know Alfie, and she misses you too" He said only to blink in surprise when Alfred just shook his head sadly. 

"No, she doesn't" He mumbled weakly as he desperately tried to wipe his tears away. Gilbert reached up and gently removed Alfred's hands from his eyes. 

"What do you mean by that?" He asked and Alfred gave him the most heart wrenching expression ever before he answered. 

"Because she hates me" He said brokenly causing Gilbert to give him a shocked look. 

"What? Alfred why would you think that?" He asked causing another sob to escape Alfred's lips. 

"Because it's my fault she's gone!" Alfred shouted through his sobs but before Gilbert could say anything he continued. 

"It was my people that killed her! She's my mother and I killed her! I can't do anything right, all I do is hurt those around me!" He shouted and Gilbert watched in horror as the American practically fell apart before him. He reached over and pulled the broken American into a tight hug. 

"That's not true Alfred, you didn't kill your mother and you definitely do not hurt everyone around you" Gilbert explained softly as he rocked Alfred back and forth. Alfred gave him a teary eyed look but before he could say anything Gilbert quickly interjected. 

"It was fates design for your mother to fade, just like my father and all of the other ancients. It's not something we could have stopped. And you bring so much light into everyone's lives Alfred, so please don't think so poorly of your self" Gilbert all but begged the American shocking Alfred greatly. 

"You really mean that?" He whispered softly and Gilbert reached up and gently wiped away Alfred's tears. 

"With all my heart" He said softly and Alfred not knowing what to say just laid his head down on Gilbert's shoulder. The Prussian smiled softly as he gently ran his fingers through the blonde's hair. 

They stayed like that for several minutes until Gilbert noticed that Alfred had fallen asleep. He smiled softly at the American before he took his glasses off and placed them on the night stand. He glanced down at all the photos and gently placed them back into the folder, as well as the painting which he had to very carefully take out of Alfred's hands. After that he placed them in the night stands drawer before gently lying Alfred down. 

He stared at Alfred before glancing at the night stand drawer, he had to make sure he was able to speak to Matthew before Alfred did or else the American might break down on his brother. He let out a tired sigh before turning off the lights and slipping under the covers. And almost instantly Alfred snuggled up into his chest causing a faint blush to appear on the Prussian's face before he fell asleep.