Heaven in Hiding (Negan)

Chapter 30

Negan and I split to get the Sanctuary back in order. I was out in the yard trying to clean up the mess that was left.

"Hey Frank. Don't forget to clean up the garden area. Hopefully some of the plants made it." He nodded and walked off. I couldn't make it over there. Jen and I spent lots of time in the garden together and it was just too hard for me right now. I was pushing a large broom across the concrete, cleaning up the glass that was everywhere. I heard some loud engines behind me then looked back to see Simon was back. I wiped the sweat from my brow and set the broom against the wall. The door opened to reveal Negan as he walked down the stairs, He didn't look too pleased. Simon hopped out of the truck and Negan walked up to him.
"It done?" Negan asked as he walked with Simon. I went to walk over to them when I heard a walkie started to make some sounds. I dusted my hands off and walked over to it. A gruff voice with a thick accent was heard. I picked it up off the ground and brought it to my lips.
"Can I help you?" I asked annoyed.
"Get. Me. Negan." Ricks voice crackled. I growled.
"You got a lot of fucking nerve. You know that?"
"Put him on Prudence." I gripped the walkie and made my way to Negan.
"Negan." I called a bit quietly since he was talking with Simon. He glanced over.
"Yeah?" He asked. I held out the walkie.
"It's Rick." He took it and I followed him as he walked away from everyone.
"Rick. Look at you. Callin me up. Can't we do this face to face?" Negan taunted.
"Carl's dead." Rick spoke. My eyes shifted to Negan. "He wrote a letter. He wrote one to you. Asking to stop. And me. Asked us for peace but it's too late. I'm gonna kill you." I watched as Negan slowly hit the button.
"How did it happen?" Negan asked sadly. I could see it in his eyes this crushed him.
"What?" Rick asked.
"How did he die? Was it us. Was it the grandes. Fire?" My heart sank as I watched Negan go through the motions. He thought we killed him and at that moment so did I. We were going hard on their community. We didn't hold back. I put my hand on his leather clad arm and gripped.
"It wasn't you. He got bit when he helped someone."
"God damn it." Negan said softly as his eyes glazed over,holding back his tears. "Listen. I am sorry. Really. I wanted him to be part of things. I had plans. That kid. He was the future."
"The only future is one where you're dead." Rick spat. I growled and went to grab the walkie but he pulled it away from me.
"The hell you doin Rick? Why are you fighting? Carl is dead because of you. You couldn't leave shit well enough alone. I mean hell maybe he could have died some other way. Shit we can die at any moment. But in this case. He is dead because of you. Because you weren't there to stop him from something something fucking stupid. You did this Rick. Who's next?"
"You are!"
"No. But someone is. You see. I stop people from dying. I'm the answer. It's time, do not let anymore of you're shitty decisions cost people you love to die. That shit. That shit sticks with you. Forever. Just like Carl will. Hell, I'm feeling it and I'm gonna be for a while. You could have just let me save all of you. That's why I did what I did. You failed. You failed as a leader. And. As a father. Just. Give up." Negan handed the walkie to me and quickly walked away back into the Sanctuary, slamming the door behind him. I walked over to Simon and handed it to him.
"Take care of this. If Rick radios again just find me."
"Got it. Everything okay with Boss man?"
"Not sure." I told him truthfully and looked at the back of the truck. "They surrendered their guns without a fight huh?" I asked.
"Yup. Sent the message and they cooperated." I nodded and walked away.
I made my way through the Sanctuary to Negans room. I reached out and opened the door.
"It's just me." I said as I walked in and closed the door behind me. When I turned around I saw Negan sitting at the edge of his bed,head in his hands. "Hey, are you okay?" I asked, walking over to him.
"I can't believe the fucking kid is gone." He mumbled. I stood in front of him and put my hands on his cheeks, pulling his face from his palms. A tear running down the left side of his face. "I'm here to fucking protect people. That kid. Carl. He was supposed to be the future of all this. He was a good kid who didn't deserve to fucking die. Especially not like he fucking did." Negans voice cracking here and there. I pulled his head into my chest and held him.
"It's not you're fault. Rick was his dad. This is all on Rick. Every. Single. Death his stupid feud caused. Is on him. From Jen and her unborn baby to his own flesh and blood. It's on him." I told him softly as I lightly ran my hand through his hair. I felt his arms wrap around my waist, pulling himself closer.

"Fuck," he said as I felt his tears dampen my top. "This bullshit has to end." I nodded in agreement, placing my chin on the top of his head.

"It will and you'll be the one to do it. I'll follow you every step of the way." He shifted a bit and I pulled away enough for him to look up at me.

"How the fuck did I get lucky enough to have you?" He asked. I smiled down at him and wiped a tear from his face with my thumb.

"I am pretty great aren't I?" I asked with a laugh. Negan pulled away and let out a long sigh before he stood up. "You okay?"

"Yeah, now I need to go talk to my bullet maker."

"Eugene?"

"Yup." He said walking into the bathroom and washing his face. "We're gonna need lots of em'."

"Do you trust him enough to make bullets for us?"
"I don't exactly got a choice do I Doll?"
"Not really."
"Then it settles. I'll send Frankie and Tonya down with him. Keep him comfortable."
"The two I like you're gonna send away?"
"You trust Amber to do anything important?"
"No."
"So she stays." I sighed.
"Fine. As long as she stays the fuck away from me." I told him as I watched him walk out of the bathroom and past me, picking Lucille up.
"I'll be back." He said before walking out.