Somebody To Call Mine (Completed)

KABANATA XLV

Kabanata XLV: I'm losing it

Ken's POV

I lost count of the days or if it's weeks– I don't really know and I don't care. Hindi ko maintindihan ang lahat ng nangyari. It's like I'm in space. I lost the gravity that's keeping me sane and on the ground. I lost my girl. I lost her without even knowing why.

Everything happens in a blur. One moment I was scrambling on my knees just to fight for her, the next moment I was sprawling in tears and pain. It is as if the kisses that they shared suck all the energy inside of me. I lost all the will. I lost the battle without even having the chance to put up a goddamn fight.

Ganun kabilis ang lahat.

Why does love have to be so complicated? I sighed. I really fall deep and hard for Mandy. Hindi siya mawala sa sistema ko at natatakot akong hindi siya ganun sakin. Na kaya niyang mabuhay na wala ako habang ako ay miserable ng wala siya.

Maybe Rafael was right. I shouldn't let Mandy rule my life. Sa tinakbo ng relasyon namin, hinayaan ko siyang dominahin ang puso ko. I let her suck out every ounce of love I could give. And by allowing that I'm left with nothing but the wounds of our failed relationship.

"Babae lang yan, Ken. You wouldn't die without her. Don't ruin your life." Aniya nung minsang abutan akong nakahandusay sa bar dala ng kalangisan. Lango ako sa alak pero ang sinabi niyang yun tumatak sakin. He's furious. Galit siya hindi dahil sa naglasing ako kundi sa dahilan ng paglalasing ko.

I've been with Raf eversince and he's like a brother to me—sila ni Zeke. He knows how I deal with problems and I know he couldn't believe how a woman can make me cripple like this. I'm tough. I'm fearless yet one woman brought all the insanity out of me. 

"Uhm Sir, the CEO is looking for you" I was taken out of the oblivion when I heard Audrey's voice.

I was quite surprised. Hindi ko napansin ang pagpasok niya. Masyado na akong okupado ng mga papeles na binabasa ko magmula kaninang umaga kaya maging ang pagbukas ng pintuan ay hindi ko na namamalayan.

Kumunot ang noo ko, "What's the matter?" I asked boringly as I slouch back on my chair. Bahagya kong minasahe ang sentido ko para maibsan ang nagbabadyang pananakit nito habang hinihintay ang sagot niya. I can't remember the last time I had a good night of sleep and rest. Kaya madalas ang pagsumpong ng migraine ko dahil sa kakulangan ko ng tulog at pahinga.

"It's about the Villanueva account, Sir." I heard her say that. Naiwan sa ere ang kamay ko sa sinabi niya. She caught my attention for some odd reason.

"W-what account?" tanong ko. I was full of hopes. Umaasa akong tama ang narinig kong sinabi niya. I want to stop myself from expecting but I just found myself holding my breath for split seconds.

She sighed. "Vil-la-cer-na, Sir."she said slowly. I felt a pang in my heart. For a while there I stared at Audrey. I thought I heard her say Villanueva. I'm hearing things.

Kumawala ang malalim na buntong hininga sakin. Pinakalma ko ang sarili ko. I told you. Expectation leads to disappointment. "What about that account? I have settled that last week." naayos ko na ang account na yun kaya nakakapagtakang pinatatawag ako ni Troy tungkol dun. It's a multi-million construction deal at dahil ako ang in charge sa mga construction deals ako ang pinag-ayos ni Troy.

"May pag-uusapan daw po kayo about some private matters and the construction next week. Kayo daw po ang in charge sa facilitation ng ground breaking just like the Cebu account." napatiim ang labi ko.