Survivor

t h r e e

What felt like days were only a few hours before I had finally brought myself to a position where I could just about control my tears over the fact that I was the only one who made it out of the crash that changed everything not even twenty four hours again.

Stiles and my uncle, Noah, had eventually left the room to let me rest whilst they also spent their own time accepting the situation that had suddenly come upon them.

My eyes were swollen and it hurt to try and keep them open. My body laid stiff as I looked up at the ceiling in though.

"I hate you."

Those three, burning words had buried themselves deep into my mind and it was all I could think about the minute I opened my eyes.

I tried to drown them out but even when I closed my eyes to sleep they continued to wander my thoughts and it made me realise that this was all my fault.

If I hadn't been so selfish, so rude and spoilt then maybe right now I could've been sitting with my cousin and my uncle, my mom and Mark at the table waiting for breakfast for a nice family reunion.

Or my mom and I could've been on one of our famous morning walks where we would stop after a while to cloud watch and have a mommy, daughter catch up.

But it was different now. Every loving moment was washed away with the fact that I told my mom I hated her before she met her end.

"Hey" Stiles had snook in quietly, his gentle voice pulling me out of my thoughts as I wiped away a quick tear and turned to him

"Scott's waiting out front to take us home. You ready?" He asked, not pushing to ask if I was okay or if I needed more comfort. Instead, he allowed me to be alone until I needed him.

The thing about Stiles is, he knew what it was like to feel this hurt. Long ago he had to sit in the same position as me when he lost his mother, the difference is he was so much younger.

I looked up to him. He was strong and always knew the right ways to make everything feel... well, right again.

I nodded, standing up and taking the hoodie Stiles had left there for me to have if I got cold. I slipped it over my head and smiled softly "Let's go home"

He smiled and wrapped an arm around my shoulder. He made sure the gesture was gentle enough that I would find the hidden comfort in it, and as we walked out together, I took in a deep breath knowing that I needed to accept this and carry on for my mom.

We headed out to the front where we were greeted by Stiles old, dusty blue jeep. A tall, built guy that stood against the passenger door had looked over at us and smiled softly.

"That's Scott." Stiles said as we walked closer, "He's my best friend and is also Melissa's son. You probably won't remember him, since he got better looking" Stiles attempted to lighten the mood, Scott tilting his head as we got closer and I let myself giggle.

Stiles nodded at Scott as we finally approached him,  "Scott you remember Karley,, my cousin?" He asked and Scott nodded, "Just about. How are you feeling?"

His eyes laid on mine and I opened my mouth slightly to reply but at first I didn't know what to say.

Instead I was letting my eyes do all the work. Scanning every single perfect feature this boy held. His tan skin that brought out the sweet glow of his eyes; a dark brown that must've held many secrets.

It was like a trance, just to admire one thing for a one moment made me feel slightly better. It was almost like everything I had to think about, deal with, face just disappeared. And all I needed to worry about was how much prettier this boy could possibly get.