101 Ways to ditch the Date | SIRIUS BLACK

No. 4

"Okay, you're probably wondering why I gathered everyone here today," Sirius said, pacing in front of the large group of people he'd assembled which included his Marauders, Lily and a group of her confused friends to even out the gender ratio.

"We all know," James said with a grin, "You messed up by going out with lawyer girl - "

"Ora? She is gorgeous, I get it," Dorcas said, winking at Sirius who gave her a stern look.

"You don't know what lies beneath the beauty," Sirius said.

"Neither have you, you didn't even kiss," James said with a grin.

"Ew, James, that's not what he meant?" Lily said, giving James a light slap on the arm which he responded to by giving her a light push. Sirius rolled his eyes at the pair of them, there was nothing platonic about them.

"Sirius, why am I here?" Marlene asked, furrowing her brow at Sirius. Before he could reply, Lily cut in.

"So what are you planning?" She asked, "Last I heard you went to talk to Remus and it's escalated fast from there."

"I have homework to do..." Mary said quietly, silently pulling her book out of her bag and hoping she wouldn't get a lecture from Marlene or Dorcas about working too much.

"Okay, for those who don't know, namely the girls, I went on a date with named Ora Dakota. She brought with her a twenty page contract which I signed," James and Remus exchanged a look and Sirius hastily added, "But in my defence, page twelve was amazing... I mean amazing."

"Yet you still won't tell me what it is!" Peter complained.

"Take an educated guess?" James shrugged.

"I tried but you won't tell me if I'm right!" Peter complained. Sirius glared at the two of them and they fell silent although James continued to snigger afterwards, just to annoy his friend.

"Okay, so everyday she collects a story from me about how I... ditched a girl on a date," This was met by loud boos from the group which Sirius had sort of been expecting, "What I need to do is figure out how to get out of this because it's only been running three days and it's already getting into my head. Remus suggested that we could maybe do more if we had the contract, maybe we could do more," Sirius said, "So I need you guys to help me plan how to steal the contract."

"Why do you assume you have to steal it?" Dorcas asked, "Maybe just ask, she seems nice enough and I guess you have a right to... maybe? I don't understand the law very well except how to break it."

"Dorcas, you stole a packet of biscuits five years ago," Marlene grumbled, "Doesn't make you a criminal."

"True but I felt that way," Dorcas said with a grin.

"Okay, so we have Dorcas the criminal with us, let's come up with some ideas!" Sirius said, clapping his hands, "Let's do this, there are no stupid ideas because let's face it, I've probably done worse at some point!"

"I could fly into her dorm if we knew which room," James suggested, "Lily, don't give me that look, have you seen me nose dive, I could do it."

"I'm just worried they'd spot you and knock you off your broom," Lily said pursing her lips.

"Invisibility cloak. Sorted," James said with a shrug, "C'mon, Padfoot, how awesome would that be, I could be in and out in a few seconds."

"Okay, that's the one to beat!"

"Sirius, you seem to be under the impression that we want to contribute to this plan to disrupt karma," Marlene said with a smirk, "I personally think it's quite funny. You messed up and dated contract girl or lawyer girl, whatever people call her and I feel like you have to pay the consequences of that."