Crush ( A Beau Brooks Fanfiction)

Chapter 22

* I just wanna say a huge apology for not updating, I moved and didn't have wifi for a week, but now I do! So here's the next chapter *

   I bring my knees to my chest as I sit on the couch. For the past couple hours, I've just been sitting here, staring at the screen of the TV that I'm paying no attention to. I'm so confused at everything, that I can't even do anything. I'm still trying to process the events of yesterday.

   I sigh and put my head on my knees.

   Maybe I should forgive Beau considering he was mistaken. He just wanted me to be jealous cause he thought I still cared for Luke. Even though I don't, I still feel bad about leaving him. A new wave of guilt had been flushed into my system. That guilt being I left Luke for Beau, and he doesn't know.

   He deserves to know the truth.

   I push myself up off the couch and head out the front door. I quickly grab my Pennyboard as I walk past it and toss it onto the sidewalk and jump on. I feel the wind pick up as I push my foot harder against the concrete. I suddenly remember one of the first days I got here and I saw Beau riding his skateboard. We had just started our friendship then, and now looking back, it's all fallen apart. I feel my eyes sting, whatever tears that were forming in my eyes are gone now because of the force of the wind.

   I turn a sharp corner and step off my board. I take it in my hands and walk up the driveway of the Brooks residence. I pray as I get closer that Beau doesn't answer the door.

   I step up to the door and study it. This house is becoming to familiar now. I bring my fist up and knock on the door, my heart pounding.

   I hear the door creak open and my heart sinks as I see half of Luke's face appear. I almost bust out crying when I see him, and it looks like he's about to do the same.

   I'm at a loss for words...how do I even start a conversation?

   "Hi..." I manage.

   The door opens a little more.

   "Hey, Alex...uhm what are you doing he-"

   I cut him off.

   "I'm sorry. I know you probably don't want to see my face right now, but I have to talk to you. There's some things you deserve to know...and I-I need your advice so please Luke...Hear me out because it's killing me."

   He hesitates, then nods, holding open the door. I quickly step inside and take a seat on their couch.

    He slowly sits down  next to me and for the first time in weeks, I look up at his face and into his eyes. Their not as bright as they used to be and his face is paler. Without asking, I can tell he took all of this really hard.

   "So." He says, "What's wrong?"

   I sigh.

   "I came over here to tell you the truth...I know I left you without a logical reason and I said it wasn't working out. But I did have a reason and I think I should tell you..."

   He nods slowly. I breathe in.

   "I left you because Beau and I had developed feelings for each other. I know we never spent much time together cause I was always with Beau. I can't tell you how sorry I am. Whenever we would talk, the guilt would eat me alive knowing that I liked Beau as well. I didn't break up with you because of a random reason, and I'm and idiot for leaving you for your older brother." I think back to the fight me and Beau had, and my eyes get wet with tears. " I shouldn't if left you for him...that was a mistake...and I'm so sorry Luke."

   I can't help it as a tear slides down my face.

   I look at him.

   His hands are folded together in his lap and he's staring at the ground, his whole body is tensed.

   He doesn't say anything.

   I hold in the tears and look down.

   "Sorry I wasted your time and I'm sorry for everything...I'll go now."

   I stand up and start to walk away, letting the warm tears spill onto my face.

   I feel a hand wrap around my wrist.

   I don't turn around yet.

   "I forgive you." I hear him whisper.

   My heart is pounding as I turn around.

   "Do you really?" He nods. "I'm pissed that you left me for Beau, but I should of known. That ass always finds a way to take everything away from me..."

   My mouth opens slightly.

   "Well, he took me and he lost me so..."

   He wrinkles his face in confusion. " Did you two...break up? Or were you even dating in the first  place?"

   I shake my head.

   "I don't even know...he was avoiding me for days and then I went to the mall with a friend and saw him in the food court with another girl on his lap and kissing her. He said he thought I didn't break up with you, so he tried to make me jealous..." I feel another tear run down my face and I turn away.

   "I should of known better...I'm such an idiot."

   "You're not an idiot, Alex...look, don't worry about him. I know I was never there for you that much and of course I still have some feelings for you but...I'll be here as a friend, okay? Me and Jai are still here for you."

   I nod and smile, pushing a loose strand of hair out of my face.

   "Don't worry, Alex...I'll get him back for this."