Chapter fifty-one

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When I'd woken up with a new version of last night's nightmare, I’d shrugged it off and tried not to make it weigh me down or affect me…

But it did.

Just like it always.

Over the years the versions of my ‘Devon nightmare’ — occasionally varied which made me never certain about which one was real — because I knew anyone could be false, as my mind used the different scenarios as a technique to make me forget the entire episode.

At least that's what I suspected as I'd never explained it to my therapist.

In each version, Devon changed, sometimes I saw a green-eyed dragon or a demon-like creature.  
Other times, he never hit me or said those words. He just left. But the one last night was the most frequent and made me believe over the years that it had to be the most accurate but as I knew I'd never see Devon again, I'd convinced myself that no matter what the truth was, I didn't care.

Now that I was awake though, for some reason, I felt weak and tired beyond reason. I closed my eyes in exhaustion as I remembered distantly hearing the door open a couple times during the night for Adam to check up on me. He always thought I was deep asleep but I just pretended, to get him off my back.

The door to my room opened and I open my eyes to see Adam peek cautiously into the room and then beam at the fact I was awake. My lips assumed a wry twist as I watched him saunter into the room fully dressed for the day unlike me in my pjs.

“How is my patient?”

I rolled my eyes before giving him a flat look. “She is fine and was just about to take her bath and get dressed for the day like her doctor.”

He ignored me and came to kneel beside me on the bed. He gazed intensely at my features, making me uncomfortable because it was like he knew something. And I didn't want him knowing anything.

“You're not fine. You don't have any signs of fever, there is no high temperature. But you look, pale, tired and sick.”

I looked away from him and tried to calm my panic because something in his voice was unnerving.

“It might be because of your lack of sleep though. You were restless even when you pretended to sleep. That's understandable though, you suffered one too many nightmares last night.”

My gaze swung back to his and I eyed him, taking in every expression in his direct, penetrating gaze. He didn't hide his worry and surety and I knew without a doubt that he'd seen me having a nightmare in one or more than that — of his visits during the night.

He was now waiting for me to say something, explain myself, but I wasn't going to.

So… deafening silence.

One that stretched for more than an appropriate while.

“I will let you take that bath now.” He finally caved, his words stiff.

I winced as it seemed like I'd hurt him someway but I forced myself to avoid looking at him as he left the room.

The day went normally but dully though Andrea, Lucy, Kevin and Lucca came to visit. There were pitying, sympathetic looks and questions I gave vague answers to.

Lucca — always having my back, and ever extra perspective helped me deflect questions that he saw made me stiffen.

Anything about what caused the faint or if it was Chloe because apparently they had all found out after Caden raised hell because he'd no idea what happened and wanted to know.

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