Consequences

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(Inspired by Mikey way's daughter, Rowan Louise Way.)

lowkey sad as fuck im sorry

Fem!Girly!Gee__Cute!Revenge!Frank

I had always wanted kids, I dreamed of having my own little Frankie's running about on the lawn, or around the house. I envied women who were able to conceive, They said I wasn't physically able to have kids, they said that if I ever did, there was a 75% chance that I would die from it, and so that made Frank not even want it anymore, not if it costs my life.

Frank was over protective, and obsessive over me. He knew what I wanted, but he was scared. I wasn't, it meant something else for me, it meant that if I die from this, he would will have a part of me with him but he had told me 'that it just wasn't the same' he described it as 'I wouldn't be able to hold the thing that killed you.' The thing, he always referred babies as things. I didn't know why, I honestly doubted that he even liked children.

Kristin and Mikey had gotten married over eight years ago and they were just now deciding to be parents. Kirsten glowed throughout the whole pregnancy, I was there with her the entire time, I envied her, I was jealous that she could bring a child into this world and I couldn't. Now don't get me wrong, I could never hate her, ever, she was basically my best friend, but I just wish that I could have a child.

When the baby was finally here, I was the first to arrive in the whole family, I helped her with everything. Contractions, food cravings, frequent swears she made at Mikey for doing this to her, but it was all worth it in the end, it was definitely worth it in the end. She held her little Rowan and let Mikey as well, so when my baby brother let me hold her, I was stunned, I wanted to cry. She was the most cutest little thing I have ever saw. Frank was with me by my side all throughout the night, and when he got to hold her, I saw something in his eyes that I had never before.

It was like pure curiosity and awe, he looked bewildered at the small being in his arms, she made some gargling noises in the back of her throat, which made Frank giggle and trace his fingers along side of her rounded face, and that right there made me realize, Yeah he loves kids, he adored kids, but if it were between me and a baby that I so wanted to have, he'd choose me. But ever since he held Rowan, I think he changed. His whole demeanor changed after we left the hospital.

When we arrived home, with warmth in our hearts, he grabbed my hands and told me that he would love to have a child with me. But then I had to sit back and think, we never had really discussed children. We were both on the same page about it now, but I had to prepare myself for the consequences, and that night, was one of the best nights I've had in a long while. Frankie was gentle with me, careful not to hurt me, he was scared he was gonna do the wrong thing.

But I guided him, and we were both filled with passion, and anticipation. We both loved each other very much, so we took it slow, not rushing anything. And then just like that, it was over. But we both enjoyed ourselves, the feeling of bliss didn't leave, and it seemed like it wasn't ever going to, which I internally was grateful for. We laid beside each other, not saying anything in particular, just embracing one another's presence while it lasted. Oh, that stung, if we're positive about things, then we won't be scared.

But the fear was clear the next few weeks, with me constantly vomiting everything, craving so much more affection than I usually did, craving foods that seemed abnormal to others around me. So when Frank bought a box filled with tests, I was a nervous wreck, I almost didn't even want to take them, knowing my outcome, but I did it anyway, and then everything changed for the both of our lives.

When I told Frank, he started to cry, he started to just. . . sob uncontrollably. But I couldn't tell if it was because he was happy, or from fear. We both were scared, Yeah, but I kept telling myself that this was worth it, worth my life, worth everything just to have Frank have a bundle of joy in his arms, and smiling down at the small being like he did with Rowan, but with much more love, much more curiosity, and so much more happiness.

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