I Love You

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Hey Lexi!
London is amazing! I can’t believe you haven’t been here yet! The people are so kind and I swear I ran into Zayn Malik from One Direction. Swear on my life. I actually see a lot of famous people here. I ran into this guy with a heck of a lot of tattoos and a funky hair cut that looked oddly familiar – I think he had been on one of Alex’s posters. I was too scared to talk to him so I just kept walking on.

I got your message about you moving to LA soon? That’s great and all but what about the house? You can’t just sell it, I mean, not after Alex. There are so many memories of her in there; I can’t let you get rid of it. Email me as soon as you know what you’re going to do with it; maybe I’ll buy it.
See, wasn’t Alex right about you and Ashley? She told me that you two would make the perfect couple and look at you! Already moving in with each other. I’ll have to come visit you sometime and finally meet the rest of the band you talk about so much. Aren’t you glad that you mixed up those letters? Imagine what would’ve happened if you had actually just given him Alex’s note. Crazy right?
Anyway, I finished Alex’s book. I’m sending it to my editor later tonight and within the next two months it’ll be published. I can’t wait for you to read it; I think this is my best work yet.
Email me when you can!
Love,
Cassandra

I stared down at my computer screen, my eyes re-reading the second paragraph. I hadn’t thought about the house. What exactly was I going to do to it? I bit my lip and looked around the living room; Cassandra was right. There were so many memories and there was no way in Hell that I was going to sell this. But how could I keep it? Once with Ashley, I probably wasn’t going to come back.

“Alright, all my stuff is packed.” Ashley interjected my thoughts, smiling sadly as he walked into the living room with his duffel bag thrown over his shoulders.

I pouted, “Why can’t you just leave with me on Friday?”

“Because, lovely Lexi, I have to start recording and I have an interview with the guys on Wednesday.” He stated.

I nodded in understand and he sat beside me on the couch, pulling me into his lap. I twisted so that I straddled him, placing my hands on his shoulder pads. He was warm to the touch and without thinking I began to run my fingers up and down his chest.

It was hard to think that in five hours, Ashley would be gone. I would be faced with the silence of the house for the first time and I didn’t know if I could handle it. He has always been by my side and I didn’t want him to leave, but I knew that for me to move on, I needed to do this. I needed to say my good-byes.

“I love you,” I whispered, pressing our foreheads together. Green connected with brown and I felt my chest swell. “I’m so happy.”

He didn’t say anything and lifted his head, pressing our lips together for a passion filled kiss. We moved in sync; he grabbed me around the waist and I held his cheeks, bringing me closer. We didn’t stop to breathe. I didn’t need air with him. He was my everything and I wanted him, all of him. Everything he could give me, I would take greedily.

“Be with me.” I whispered against his pink lips.

I felt his intake of breath, his hand moving lower, and every touch of love he gave me. I felt like I was on cloud nine as he held me with such gentleness, as he finally filled me in ways that no one else could. Everything was about him and nothing else; there were no worries, no pain. It was perfect and it was us.

Afterwards, when we were laying on the couch, our limbs were entwined so intricately I had no idea where I began or he ended. He was all I could smell and see, and all that mattered.



I stood in the doorway, wrapped tightly in the blanket from the couch, and watching as Ashley put his things in the trunk of the taxi. He was sluggish and shuffled his feet, not wanting to go, and I wanted to scream and beg for him to stay. His eyes were rimmed red when he walked back to me, wrapping his arms around me tightly and pulling me into his chest.

“It’s only five days.” He muttered against my neck.

I smiled sadly and pulled back, placing my hand on his cheek, “I love you.”

“I love you so much. I can’t wait to see your smiling face again.” He breathed before he bent down and pressed his lips against mine in a slow kiss.

“Bye. I love you.” I repeated, not knowing what else to say. If I had it my way, I would cling to him so tightly and never release him.

He nodded once more, and with one last passionate kiss, he stepped back and entered the taxi. I stood still until the cab was out of sight and for once in the last four months, I was by myself.



Not a day later, someone was banging on my door.

I didn’t want to move from my spot on my bed, inhaling the fleeting scent of Ashley. I hadn’t managed to sleep last night and my body wasn’t allowing me to move. I ached to be held by familiar tattooed arms.

The knocking didn’t stop. It was persistent and it reminded me that I was alone again. When it still continued not to stop, I managed to clamber out of bed and shuffle towards the front door. I stood on my tip toes to peer out of the peep hole and gasped at who I saw.

I yanked the door open and was immediately engulfed by pale arms.

“Aw my poor Lexi,” Morgan Biersack cooed, patting my cheek in a motherly way. “I know it’s hard but you can’t lay in bed all day.”

“How did you know?” I gasped, standing back to allow her to bustle into the room.

“I do date the lead singer of a band, Lexi.” She reminded me as she turned to face me.

I noticed two things at once. First, wow. Morgan looked dazzling in a blue dress that hugged her in all the right places and exposed her growing baby bump. Her skin was practically glowing and her cheeks were a naturally red color I hadn’t seen before. Second, she had a suitcase beside her feet.

“Wow.” I breathed, not knowing where to begin.

“I’m here to help you pack,” She stated, eyeing my house. “Do you have any boxes?”

“What?”

She rolled her brown eyes and placed her hands on my shoulders, “You’re still moving in with Ash, right?”

“Y-Yeah.”

“Well, we need to pack, right?” She urged me.

I blinked, “Right, yes. We do.”

She smiled with pleasure and turned on her heel, “Okay, grabs some boxes and we’ll start on the living room.”



For the next thirty minutes, I struggled to find enough boxes while Morgan began to grab pictures frames and wrap them in newspaper. When I returned, she was sitting cross legged on the floor, and with her tongue stuck out, struggled to wrap the frames.
“Need help?” I laughed, setting the box beside her.

She sighed, “No. My fingers are just pudgy. I couldn’t put my wedding ring on yesterday.” She admitted, lifting up her necklace to show me her wedding ring dangling from it.

“How far along are you anyway? Five months?” I asked, sitting across from her and beginning to wrap a picture of Alex and me; the one that she had broken actually. It wasn’t as painful to look at it anymore.

“Two months, actually,” She glowered and my eyes widened in shock. “I know I’m huge. My doctor says it’s because of the babies and that’s its perfectly normal for me to be this big so early.” She explained in a casual tone.

“How’s Andy?” I asked once I had finished the frames and I began to grab vases and other glass things that I was near.

She shrugged, “He’s happy about it. He wants his boy and girl and he’s already demanding that we name him Bruce and her Robin.”

I choked on my laughter and she sent me a glare.

“I’m sorry but that’s funny.” I admitted.

She groaned, “It’s so hard! It’s hard enough choosing one name but two? Plus, we don’t know if we want to know the sexes yet.”

“I’m sure it’ll come to you.” I offered.

“Sure hope so.” She muttered before we lapsed into silence.



“Pickles!” Morgan shouted, grabbing the glass jar and shoving them into the basket I was holding.

We received strange looks as Morgan and I made our way through the grocery store. It probably didn’t help that I had nappy hair and was wearing pajamas while Morgan was very loudly stating what she wanted to eat. We probably looked like we were high.

“Do you want kids?” Morgan suddenly asked as we were checking out.

“Yeah, why not? Ashley wants some so we’ll probably have a few in the future.” I explained, grabbing our grocery bag and following her to our car.

“The age difference doesn’t bother you?” She pondered.
“I don’t really think about it, honestly. He’s just Ashley. He’s not thirty or twenty one. He’s just . . . mine.”

She smiled, “Aw, you two are adorable.”

“What about you? Isn’t Andy almost four years older than you?”

“Just about. We met when he was twenty and I was seventeen.”

“Isn’t that illegal?” I asked in confusion.

She winked, “They didn’t have to know.”

My laughter could be heard all around the parking lot.



“Alright, get a good night’s rest and we’ll be gone by the morning.” Morgan said when we entered the house.

It was strange seeing everything gone. The living room was completely empty and the kitchen only had a few straggling things I didn’t want to bring along. The only piece of furniture I had left was my mattress which Morgan and I were sharing for the night. The moving truck would be here around ten in the morning to pick up the things and by twelve Morgan and I planned to be on the highway heading towards Ashley and Andy.

“Alright.” I muttered my agreement.

She smiled at me before waddling down the hall and towards the bathroom to clean her face. I stayed still in the living room and closed my eyes, remembering everything.

The first day Alex and I had moved in, Alex had tripped and ran her head into the doorway. There was a little chip there from it and Alex had cried for almost an hour afterwards, spouting nonsense about how the house was haunted. The tile above the stove was charred from when I had burnt my first turkey and there was a stain on the counter from where Cassandra had spilled her wine from laughing so hard.

So many things had happened here. This house had been my haven, my worst nightmare, and where I found true love. It held so many wounds from Alex and me, and I was happy that Cassandra was buying it. It would still be in our life and I could visit whenever I wanted. It was just hard to let go.

“I love you, Alex.” I whispered to the dark before following Morgan.

One chapter left :'(

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