Trust the Wrong Number || Ashton Irwin

Fifty-Three: Heartbreak

[Ashton]

The last time I felt this awful was the time Bec caught me lying and figured out who I really am.

The difference is, though, I'm even worse now than I was then. It's been a few days since Rebecca saw the picture, and she hasn't been replying to any of my messages or answering any of my calls.

I've still been playing concerts every night, and although I've been there physically, I haven't been mentally.

I've been playing the parts, but only because of muscle memory, since I've played it so many times. I honestly don't even remember what happened during each show.

All I feel right now is emptiness. I don't know what to even do. I want her to listen, but she won't.

At first, I couldn't believe that she actually believed that I would cheat on her—that girl kissed me! But then I remembered everything she's been through. She has been betrayed and lied to by so many people, so of course she would think that I would do the same.

She still has those walls built up and she is still afraid to trust me. I know she has said that she does, but I can tell that she can't forget about all of her former "friends" and that causes her to have trust issues that she can't let go of, and because of those trust issues, it has left us both broken.

People have noticed it, too— about me, at least. People have been tweeting and commenting about how I haven't seemed the same since the picture was taken. Do they really expect me to be okay when the love of my life hates my guts?

Rebecca, however, hasn't been seen in public until yesterday when she was spotted in Sydney going into our recording studio. Why was she going into the studio? I have no clue.

"Ash," Michael says as he pops his head into my bunk of the bus. We've been driving for a few hours, but I'm not sure what show is next. I haven't been keeping up. "Pizza is ready."

Without a word, I slide out of my bunk and follow him into the small space where the kitchenette and the living room is. I slide 2 slices of pizza onto my plate and turn around to go back to my bunk, but Calum stops me.

"Please eat with us," he frowns. "We've missed you."

I sigh and sit on the sofa next to Luke and silently eat my pizza. The boys look around awkwardly for a moment.

"Has she texted you back?" Luke asks quietly.

"What do you think," I snap.

"Hey, I know you're upset but that doesn't mean you can snap at your best friend like that," Calum scolds me.

I sigh heavily and run a hand over my face.

"I know," I frown. "I'm sorry, I'm just really stressed and upset."

"Have you tried to explain over text what really happened?"

"She stopped reading them the day it happened. She always keeps her read receipts on," it's quiet for a moment before I get another idea. "Wait, has she responded to any of you?"

"Nope."

"Not me."

I look at Michael, who is the only one to not respond. He looks everywhere but my eyes.

"Michael," I look at him suspiciously. "has Rebecca spoken to you?"

"What? Psh... No, why would she message me?" he speaks quickly. Michael's always been a bad liar.

"Michael," I warn.

"Okay, fine! She has messaged me, but she told me not to tell you or she will stop talking to me!" he spills.

"Why didn't you tell me?!" I yell.

"She didn't want me to! I tried to tell her she needs to hear you out, but she wouldn't listen!"

"Guys," Luke says sternly. "Fighting isn't going to solve anything."

"Give me your phone, Michael," I say as calmly as I can. He looks at me confused and I repeat myself slowly.

"Okay, here," he surrenders. I stand up and he gives me his phone. I immediately type Rebecca's number into the phone and press the call button.

The phone rings twice before the beautifully familiar voice I have missed so much echoes through the speaker against my ear.

"Hey, Michael, the boys and I recorded the song and I'll be posting it in a few hours!" she says excitedly.

"Rebecca," I choke out, ignoring her comment about recording a song. The line is silent.

"I don't want to talk to you, Ashton," she finally says.

"Wait, Bec, please!"

I hear a sigh through the phone.

"What?"

"You have to hear me out, I promise it isn't what you think!" I plead.

"I don't want to hear your excuses, Ashton," she spits, and I can tell he is crying.

"Rebecca, please," I cry. "She came onto me, I swear! You have to believe me!"

"I don't know what to believe anymore," she whispers.

"Rebecca," I let out a small sob.

"I'm done, Ash. I'm done being lied to. You said you loved me and I believed you. You said I could trust you, and I believed you. I was so stupid because I actually believed you," she choked out.

"It wasn't a lie, though, Rebecca," I try and explain.

"Don't," she says. "I'm done, Ashton. I'm done with all of this."

"Please," I try and say, but it barely comes out. I've never cried this hard over a girl before, because I've never loved someone as much as I love her.

"Goodbye, Ashton," she says, but it comes out as a whisper. The line dies, and inside of me, so do I.

I collapse on the floor and break into sobs.

"Ashton?" Michael says worriedly. I had completely forgot the boys were still here.

"It's over," I sob. "It's all over."

"Maybe she needs some time," Luke consoles.

"She hates me," the words come out as a whisper as another sob escapes my lips. "She'll never trust me again."

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double update bc i've been gone a few days

comment and vote

~Hannah💔