120 days of Summer

Day 70

  The minute I've landed in LA I was alone. My parent's did'nt come to pick me up so I had to walk to bus station that was half a hour away of the airport. The sun burned every part of my body and the sweat drizzled my whole body.
I've waited even longer for a bus to come and I found myself home in the late noon hours.
I wasn't surprised even a bit to find the house empty,just an note on the door.

Sorry for not meeting you!
tommorow we'll talk about everything!
love,mom and dad

Now,ten day's after I came back home from warped my parents still ignored me. I could die and they won't care. I had month and a half till colge life will start and I'll leave this house.
Today I woke up alone,the house was in complete silence which I've already was used.
People called me in the first two day's,asking if I landed and if everything is fine,but afterwards nobody even texted me. I never thought that lonliness can hurt you so much...

I decided to go for a walk and clear my mind. After I've changed my PJ into some shirt and pants that I found in my closet I walked outside the house.The house were identical to the other houses in this street-white walls,red roof,green yard and a parking.
I missed morning company,where you don't feel lonly and sad but I had no friends that could make me happy-not even Sky.

When I found the little park where I used to hang out with my ex-boyfriend I just felt numb,not even one feeling could jump into my chest. I'd rather feel pain instead of this emptiness. I was missing Austin and the anger slowly faded away and I could think with clear mind. In conclusion, I knew that I'll go and ask for forgivness but not now.
The place left so many memories-my first kiss,the first time I talked to a boy,the first time he hold my hand... I shook my head to forget it,I deserve someone better.
To ignore the numbness I just took out my pack of cigarettes and a lighter. When I lit the first one some smoke got into my eye's. I hate everything.I was so tired of every fuck up thing that happen to me...
While I was inhaling the toxic smoke into my lung's I've got a call from my mom,I just ignored her. When I exhaled the smoke outside my mouth I became so fascinated by the smoke that I even saw my mom walking towards me.
"I thought you quited smoking", she stated and at this point I understood who was standing in front of me.I threw the butt and looked at her.
"Well,you thought wrong"
"Whatever. Lets go home, I need to talk with you", her voice had this annoying tone which she had when things were going in the wrong way and didn't fit her life-style.

We walked home quitly and far from each other,keeping the distance. When we got to our destination my mom was walking first to open the door. I was right behind her when car door slammed and I realized that my dad came home. It was so odd that they both suddenly wanted to have some time with me.
"sit", my mom ordered me and pointed to the couch. I did what she said, I hae enough troubles.
"We need to talk about something your mother found in your things",his voice was tired and annoyed,even not a little concern was there.
"I found some razor's inside yout wallet".
I froze when her word's hit me. My body stiffened and I could'nt do any move.
"And now I found that you're smoking! Again with the attention"
All I wanted is to cry and run away,but I just didn't.
"If you won't stop we'll have to take you back to NY",they wanted it to happen.

"I knew that you'll search for an excuse to make me leave your house,well you got what you wanted", I yelled at them. They did'nt had the chance to make a sound when I stormed up stairs to pack my things.
Since most of my stuff still were at the suitcases and in my bag I took them and ran out of the room,not looking back to say goodbay and look at it for the last time.
My mom and dad didn't even stoped me from going,I was 19 now and they can't say me what to do,I just was the only one who knew their real intentions.

I was sitting at the train station for hours,thinking about where to go and what to do. I was sad and hurt that my family hates me. I can't call my uncle because he'll just stop talking to them and they'll hate me even more.

The time was nearly midnight and I was tired,thirsty and hungry and my options started to dissapear. I knew that the chances that he will be awake are realy little,but I've decided to take a shot and try.
"Hello?"
I just was silent and didn't say a word.
"Summer? are fine?", now his voice was so worried and broken.
"Austin, can you pick me up? I'm in the train station and I don't have a place to go...",I whispered into the Phone.
"I'll be there in ten"

I was sitting outside the station, staring at the floor when he stopped the car and walked to me.
"Summer,talk to me!what happened?"
At this moment I just broke and the tears fell down on my face.
"I just need a hug"
He stop the question's and hugged me.
"I'm so stupid! I love you so much...", I said between my sobb's.
"I love you too...let's go to my place"
But before he moved I kissed him. At first he didn't move,when he understood what happening he kissed me back. The kiss was like home,a place you were missing and now you were there again.
Austin took my stuff and threw them into the back seat,and then making me to sitt at the front when he sit at the driver sit. Before he started the car he took my hand and looked into my eyes.
"Everything will be fine,you're with me now",I just nodded because right now it's to hard for me to believe in that.