Limits. (Zak Bagans Fan Fic)

The Worst Day.

"Roni" Aaron caught me in my room crying into my pillow. "Hey" he crouched down and pulled me off the pillow.

I sat myself up and fixed my dress. Today was my grans funeral and I was not ready for today. "That's a pretty black dress." I fiddled with my dress, it was a simple dress; long sleeves, low back and just above the knees.

"I had to buy a new dress" I started to choke up. "I-I couldn't wear a old dress."

"It's lovely."

I turned around to see home looking very handsome in a all black suit. "Wow."

He looked over at the clock. "It's time." He grabbed my hands and placed kisses on my arms. "I'm here for you." He reassured me.

We headed towards the car when I noticed Zak walking up the drive way with a big bundle or white roses. He too was in a black suit and looking incredibly gorgeous,

"Zak" I spoke with ease, knowing he'd be by my side today made it much easier to get through. I was thankful I had Aaron but Zak was something much more.

"I'm here Roni" he placed the roses down and brought me in for a hug, a nice warm tight hug. "Let's go."

I looked back at Aaron who rolled his eyes and got in the car. I sat in the front with him, we soon drove off and I held my hand over his hand, I forgot about Aaron. I forgot how hard this was going to be on him too, he loved gran.

"I'm sorry" I whispered to him.

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I stood alone being the last family member of gran, the people lined up and each payed their condolences to me. There was cousins whom I didn't remember, old friends of grans who knew me but I didn't remember and then there was familiar faces like Zak and Aaron and... Carter.

"Oh god no" I whispered to myself, my head started to pound at the sight of him being here.

"Roni" Carter was next, I look over to gran as she laid working the closed casket. God she was lucky.

"What are you doing here?" I was stern with him, I glared down at him hoping he knew I didn't want him here.

"You know she loved me, wanted us to get married, she wanted a family for you remember" he answers cocky. "Paying my respects." He fixed his tie.

"You've payed them so go." I rolled my eyes and shook the hands of the next person. Carter stood next to me and wrapped his arm around me like we were some 'happy' couple. "Hands off." I snapped at him.

I ignored Carter's presence and continued doing what I was doing, this day was hard enough and now I have Carter annoying me. Where was Aaron?

I skimmed through the other room where we held the wake for gran, I went off to find Aaron but I found Zak who looked very distressed.

"Zak what's wrong?" I put my hands on either side of his face. "Hey" I spoke softly, I looked over his shoulder and saw Aaron with a woman.

"Roni I need you stay away form Aaron" I glared at him.

"Is this a jealousy thing?" I asked angrily.

"No! What fuck no" he looked very angry. "Just please stay with me." He pushed my hands off his face and pulled me away from the balcony.

"Zak you're hurting me" I complained. My wrist went red and people were starting to look, I tried pulling myself out from his grip but it wasn't working so I bit him. "Sh--!" He yelled causing attention to himself.

I managed to runaway and head back to balcony to see Aaron or to see who he was with, I pushed through the doors and there stood my worst fear.

My mother.

"Roni" Aaron turned around to see me, I felt dizzy and betrayed that Aaron was talking to her.

"Fuck" Zak ran out breathless.

"Ah reunion!" Carter approached us all, raising his glass. "Best funeral ever!" He cheered.

"Okay! Firstly!" I screamed then proceeded to punch Carter again. I sent him down three stairs, his glass shattered and blood started to pour down his nose.

"Aaron" I gasped. "You didn't" I looked at my pathetic excise for a mother.

"No. God no Roni, she turned up. I'm trying to get her to leave that's why Zak took you away." Aaron looked at Zak who was still glaring at Carter.

"Veronica" my mother spoke, let's call her Helen. Helen from Hell.

"Helen." I looked at her in disgust.

"It's mum" she answered stupidly.

"YOU'RE NOT MY MOTHER. YOU ABANDONED ME! YOU DIDN'T LOVE ME, YOU DON'T GET TO WALK IN HERE AND CLAIM THAT TITLE. FUCK YOU! I HATE YOU!" I screamed in her face, I threw my hands around in the air trying to prove my point. I wanted to hit her, claw at her skin, anything that could hurt her but it would never show an inch of hurt she did to me.

As you would've guessed the party came to an end once people heard all the commotion, I stormed inside and ran to the nearest exit. I had to get out of here, I ran down the long, gravel driveway and jumped into a taxi.

"Where to?"

I didn't have my own home, I had no where to run. I couldn't even get on a airplane and get out of Sin City so I gave the address to Aaron's house, that would have to do for now.

I was back at Aaron's, his car wasn't here so I knew he was still out maybe looking for me? I headed to my room and locked myself in for the night, if he was going to come home I didn't want to see him or Zak or really anyone.

I pulled out a box from my childhood where I had written letters to Helen begging her to come home, pictures I drew for us in school. I remembered how depressed she got when my father passed away, she started to sleep all day, drink all night and she stared getting abusive. She started to yell at me and tell me I'm worthless, I was a mistake and that I ruined her life and I'm the reason my father decided to take his own life. I was 8 when she'd tell me this, I didn't understand much but I understood that she blamed me for everything.

I promised myself I wouldn't cry over her, I promised myself I would never open this box again and here I am drowning in my own pool of tears.

I've never fully overcome the neglect, deprivation, abandonment and the abuse. I thought I did but laying here and having these feelings, clearly I haven't achieved anything.