[Narry One Shots]

My Lovebug

In which Niall almost kills a bug, but doesn't exist the good in all creatures?

My Lovebug


Niall squats in the corner right behind the couch and he's not really sure what to do in an emergency situation like this. He's called his boyfriend several times by now, but the idiot doesn't pick up.

What even does that guy have a phone for? What even does one have a boyfriend for, who won't reply the calls?
Emergency calls.

Niall starts sweating nervously and peeks over the cushions of the couch, but quickly hides again. That monster in front of the sofa just moved! It moved!
Can one believe that?!

It's about to kill him, Niall knows it. He has to kill this thing somehow before it kills him. He actually wants his boyfriend to come and kill it, but Niall apparently has no such luck and his boyfriend clearly is not a knight in shining armour. He's hooked himself a really shitty boyfriend.

He risks another peek.

That little fucker is clearly crawling towards Niall and making the poor boy its prey. How does he deserve that? How does he deserve such an awful death? He already can imagine the headline of the newspaper tomorrow:

Ridiculously attractive boy with a nice arse killed by monstrous and deathly mutation of an insect

And the text will be about how the extremely gorgeous but dead guy has not been saved by his useless boyfriend. And said boyfriend will die of shame and he will also never move on from this great loss. 

Niall curses internally. He has to take matters into his very own hands. 
Okay, he has to plan this first, before he makes just a simple move.

Another another peek. The level of danger is so high, Niall's blood is pumping like mad. 

The monstrosity somehow manages in the time Niall doesn't observe it to crawl nearer and nearer. It's getting so real in Niall's living room. You can literally feel the tension. 

"Okay, my friend", Niall decides that talking calmly at first is always better than starting a war with beating and punching and shooting and killing and all that stuff. 

"I don't like what you're doing and I also don't like that you are even here, you understand? I bet in the insect world, you're a really pretty bug, but in my world you are not. If you would please be so kind and just leave?"

Niall stares at the dangerous insect from his hiding position behind the couch. Is that thing looking at him? Niall feels its billion eyes all over his body. Does a bug of this sort even have that many eyes? Most likely, all bugs have the eyes. 

Niall shudders and clears his throat. 

"So, uhm, I reckon you like it here, because yeah, I have to admit that this flat is really nice, but... you feel. It's not your natural habitat. It's mine. And my boyfriend's. Well it's been my boyfriend's habitat, too, but I guess I have to reconsider that now."

The monster doesn't move anymore, it probably just stares at Niall and makes him feel uncomfortable and most of all he feels like a bad host. He likes having guests over, just not this kind of guest.
But then again, all guests are the same, right?

Niall climbs onto the couch, after he makes sure that it's save and that the bug can't fly. Or jump at him and smash its ginormous teeth into Niall's soft neck flesh. 
Then he looks down at the small bug. Uhm. The gigantic bug.

"I guess you could have a nice personality. For a bug. You know?", Niall asks and he must look like a complete idiot talking to an insect. "Are you a friendly beetle? Where's Ringo, George and John?"

He laughs all by himself at his stupid joke.

Niall wishes he could share this wonderful pun with his boyfriend... if he has one anymore, at least.
His boyfriend would giggle cutely and then Niall would coo at him and they would make slow passionate love after that.

Niall sighs.

"Okay, bug, you either need to leave or I have to kill you. Only one of us can survive and it'll be sure as heck not you!"

The bug stays silent. Ready to die?

"I'm not one to kill things, I feel so bad about it. My boyfriend kills the things. He's a killer boyfriend."

Another witty pun to share with no one but a bug on the floor.

"You look kinda cute, though"

Niall can't believe he's hearing himself saying that. How ridiculous is that? A cute bug?
The only cute bugs to ever exist are ladybirds. And not even those! 

"Uhm... we could be friends, you know? Like homies. Bug and human homies. Mates. Pals. But we're not getting any closer than that, I've got a boyfriend! Don't forget!"

He doesn't care if he sounds like a white girl, he has to make this clear between the bug and himself, before things go weird and their friendship is ruined.

"Do you have a name?", Niall wonders and contemplates about which name he should give the insect.
What about Charles? Charles the bug. Charles the almighty bug. King of the bugs. Or Paul McBugney.

"Harry."

Niall almost falls over and chokes on his own spit. After coughing for an eternity, he pulls himself together and shakes his head vigorously.

"No, your name can't be Harry, that's my boyfriend's name"

"But it is and there is nothing you can do about it. Well, you could always call me lovebug and kiss me", the bug replies and does its mouth move? Does it have a mouth? How is this thing even able to talk?

"Dude, I told you, we can't become a couple or lovers or... you're a goddamn insect, for god's sake!", Niall cries out loud and throws his arms up in frustration. "You might be a nice beetle, but really!"

"So you won't kill me?"

Somehow the bug's voice seems to be suspiciously familiar, but well. 

"No, I won't kill you, promise", Niall sighs and shrugs. "We're friends now, right? And friends don't kill each other. I also won't let my boyfriend kill you. You're safe, man."

Suddenly two warm arms wrap around Niall's torso and he's engulfed in a hug. Niall lets out a manly shriek and tries to fight the attacker with hands and legs. 
"Bug! Save me!"

"I told you my name is Harry", the voice of the bug and the voice of the attacker whisper into Niall's ear at the same time and then Niall realises and groans. He stops struggling.

How did he fall for that one?

"You're the worst boyfriend ever, why did you do this to me?", Niall complains and pulls his boyfriend over the cushions of the couch onto his lap, where Harry settles himself comfortably.

"Oh, you were just too cute, baby, and I didn't want to interrupt your bug-whispering", Harry smiles and runs his hands through Niall's hair, who pouts adorably. What a cute boyfriend he caught himself there.

"I thought it was real, you know?", Niall mumbles and buries his face into Harry's shoulderblade, where it's warm and cosy and safe. 
"I know, babe.", Harry chuckles lightly and kisses his boyfriend's cheek. They stay like that, huddled together, for a while, before Harry speaks up again:

"I kinda think the bug is dead anyway, Niall."