Big Book Of Smornby One Shots

Smith And Ross (01 and 02) [S]

TW: Undertale!AU (You don't have to know the game to get it) (Smith as Royal Guard 01, Ross as Royal Guard 02, Trott as Frisk) 

Trott continued to walk down the twisted pathways of the hotlands, desperate to make it out of the horrible area before he collapsed from over heating. He had finished his last nice-cream a while ago and didn't know if he could survive another battle in the incredible heat.
Another five minutes passed and Trott was being to think his luck had changed. He was yet to meet another monster who wanted to battle. The boy smiled to himself and began to pick up the pace, hoping to make it out before his luck changed. Sadly his good luck changed as he heard a man call out to him from behind.

"Hey! You! Stop!"

Trott stopped and turned around to face the man. He was meet with two guards covered in what looked to be thick black armor. Not wanting to pick a fight, Trott simply stood silently, waiting for the guards to talk.

"We've, like, recieved an anonymous tip about a human wearing a top with a Walrus on it. They told us they were wandering around the hotlands right now!"
Trott looked down at his t-shirt that had a picture of a cartoon walrus on it and sighed. Looks like he was in for another fight. But before he could do anything, the guard began to talk again.

"I know, sounds scary, huh? But don't worry, just stay chill and we will bring you some place safe, ok?"
Trott raised his eyebrows at the guard, wondering if he was joking, but the guard simply gestured for Trott to follow him and the man was simply too exhausted from the heat to even try and argue. Truthfully, he was curious to see where this was going.

The two guards began to walk back towards where Trott had come from and the human simply followed. It didn't take long for the other guard to stop, causing the others to stop too.

"Huh, what is it bro?"
The guard who had been talking to Trott asked his friend, obviously confused as to why he had stopped walking.

"Ross, bro. His shirt."
The guard, Ross, turned towards Trott and visibly looked the man up and down.

"Bro, his shirt?"
Ross turned back towards the other guard and repeatedly turned his head between Trott's shirt and his friend.

"Smith bro, are you thinking what I am thinking?"
The guard name Smith nodded his head.

"Bummer. This is like mega embarrassing."
Ross turned back towards Trott, who was currently holding his hand infront of his mouth in order to stop himself from laughing. It seemed that everyone he meets in the underground are actually just mega dorks. He loves it.

"We, like, have to totally kill you and stuff."
Trott nodded at the two and pulled out his stick, ready to defend himself until he could figure out a way to talk these two out of fighting.
In synch, the two guards pulled out their swords and yelled "TEAM ATTACK" before swiping at Trott. He easily dodged their attacks, finally his small size had come in handy.
All three men paused for a second to catch their breath, the heat getting to them as much as the fighting.

"Smith bro, nice attack."

"Dude, yours was way nicer bro."
Trott couldn't help but roll his eyes at the guards, they should get a room. Suddenly Trott had an idea.

"Dudes, time out for a sec."
Both the guards turned their attention back towards their supposed victim.

"It is way too hot to fight, why don't we take our shirts off and cool down for a minute and then we can continue this fight fairly?"
Trott waiting while the two guards thought his proposal over. It was a stupid idea, but from what he had seen, these two weren't exactly the brightest guards he had ever met.

"Dude I don't..."

"Bro that is the best idea ever!"
The guard known as Ross interrupted Smith and before he could finish his sentence, Ross was taking off his chest plate.
Ross was actually quite slim and man did he have some nice abs (although he was insanely hairy). Trott found himself staring and quickly averted his gaze towards Smith and was happy to find that Ross was having the same effect on the man. Although Trott couldn't see any of Smith's facial expressions, the guard was muttering to himself and shaking a bit from what he could only assume were nerves.

"Hey, Smith was it?"
Smith quickly snapped his gaze away from Ross and towards Trott.

"Y-yes, human?"

"You should just be honest with your feelings."

"W-w-what!? I don't know what you are talking about. Ross, bro! Let's get back to like killing this human and stuff."
Trott cursed under his breath as both guards readied for an attack. He had obviously gotten to Smith, but apparently it wasn't good enough.
Trott dodged their attack again, much easier this time as it seemed that both of the guards were distracted.

"Guys seriously. Just admit it."
Smith froze in place and Ross looked at Trott.

"Dude, admit what?"
Before Trott could reply, Smith dropped his sword and turned to face Ross.

"Dude, bro, I can't....... I can't take this anymore!"
Smith took off his helmet, to reveal an almost human looking head, with the only odd aspects being lack of hair and the green colour to his skin. He let the helmet drop from his hand and fall onto the ground with a clunk.
Ross followed his lead and also took of his helmet. Again his face was quite human like, the parts of his face that weren't covered in hair had the same pale colour as Trott's own face and the only truly odd aspects were the two dog-like ears sitting on the top of his head.

"Bro, what's up?"
Smith took a deep breath in, to try and settle his nerves.

"Like, Ross, I..... I like, LIKE, you bro."
Ross' expression changed from one of confusion to one of understand as Smith continued to talk.

"The way you fight, the way you talk. I love doing team attacks with you. I love standing here with you, making jokes when we should be working. I like, want to stay like this forever."
Both Smith and Trott were anxiously waiting for Ross to reply, but it seemed the other man was too overwhelmed by Smith's confession to say anything. The trio stood in silence for minutes before Smith began to realize that maybe he had made a mistake.

"I, mean, uh..... Bro, that human totally put me under mind control! Did I just say something? Cause you totally can't trust anything I just said. It was all that human."
Oh no, Trott was not going to let him just back out like that, he had become invested in these two guards and they were going to get together.

"I did not! Humans don't have mind control!"

"They do too!"

"Do not!"

"Smith?"
Trott and Smith stopped their bickering and turned to face Ross.

"Yeah Ross?"

"Did you want to get some ice cream?"
Smith smiled at Ross.

"Yeah bro, sounds good."
Ross smiled back at Smith.

"I don't think we are bros any more dude."
Smith's smile faded, he went to say something but Ross got there first.

"Dude we are so totally boyfriends now."
Smith's smile returned just as quickly as it had left.

"Dude yes! I love it!"

The two guards just stood, looking at each other happily. Giving Trott enough time to slip away and continue on his journey.

Credit to geniusesfitzandsanders on Ao3