Chapter 37: It wasn't your fault

Start from the beginning
                                    

Anger, betrayal, heartbreak, sadness, loneliness, depressed, broken. Dean was feeling all of those emotions. Dean never wanted you or anybody to see them, he wanted to wear a mask so no one could see how he really felt.

Mary: Dean if I go back in time I would, you know I would.  I am the worst mother ever.

Dean just looks at Mary, his eyes full of tears, one slipping down his cheek.

Mary: Dean please don't cry

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

Mary: Dean please don't cry.
Dean: I wish I couldn't feel a damn thing.

Mary looks at her son, wishing to hold him, to comfort him

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

Mary looks at her son, wishing to hold him, to comfort him. Mary would sing hey Jude to Dean or play batman with him.

Mary: Dean, I am sorry.

Dean looks at his mother and more tears roll down his cheek.

Dean looks at his mother and more tears roll down his cheek

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

Mary: you still blame yourself don't you Dean?

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

Mary: you still blame yourself don't you Dean?

Dean looked away and he cried more. He still blamed himself for Mary's death.  He thought it was his fault that his mother was gone, but it was an accident. Dean always blamed himself, he couldn't forgive himself.

Mary: Dean it was an accident

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

Mary: Dean it was an accident. We didn't know it was going to happen.
Dean: I should've protected you. I should've gotten dad to check the damn detectors!!
Mary: Dean, it wasn't your fault. It was an accident. It wasn't your fault. Please stop blaming yourself angel.

Dean wanted to stop blaming himself, but deep down he knew his father and brother were disappointed

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

Dean wanted to stop blaming himself, but deep down he knew his father and brother were disappointed. He knew they were angry with him but they never brought it up. Dean felt like everything that happened to him and Sam as kids, was his fault. Mary's death, John drinking, John leaving the boys, Sam always fighting with Dean because dean never let Sam hang out with friends. Dean thought that everything that happened to his family was his fault.

Dean: I should've died in the fire instead of you mom.

Dean: I should've died in the fire instead of you mom

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Cruel Trick (BadBoy!Dean x nerd! Reader)Where stories live. Discover now