She's lost In A Sea Of Poetry

Sucking Out The Poison

I wanted someone to catch me.

Someone to glue me back togther and for some odd reason, i was still hoping that person would be him.

But i knew it wouldn't be.

He promised me he'd always be here when i need him, but where was he now?

I was hoping the same person who had broken me could fix me, but i knew it didn't work like that.

I kept hoping the thing that had knocked me down would pull me back up.

I kept wishing that if i were to crash and burn again,he'd be there to rescue me,

to pick me back up and catch me this time.

But with that hope all i was doing was breaking myself more.

I had to realize he wasn't there for me anymore and i couldn't expect him to be any longer.

I had to accept that he wasn't going to catch me.

The thing that had dropped me,catch me?

Sounds funny to think that right?

But that was what i was hoping would happen.

Though with that i sunk farther, and farther into depression.

Till one day i decided I'd try to save myself.

I decided to try and be myself,by myself and to love myself,again.

I decided that only i could do this.

That i am in control of my own happiness.

He might have added to my happiness but i couldn't let him take it away too.

But i am still walking though this raging war, trying  to detach myself from this person,

And slowly but surely i am trudging forward and forward into better days.

I am going to be there for myself,this time.

I am going to love myself,with all my broken pieces.