Learning, and growing

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I remember in my past relationships feeling these lingering emotions of doubt. 

No matter what i did, or what happened, nothing felt right,

Not really.

Not in the, 'this-is going-to-last' or the 'this-is-the-right-person'  way.

Sure I thought they were at the time.

But even though I had convinced myself they were the right person for me they weren't.

And even though I told myself they were my intuition told me they weren't

Love had blinded me. 

One day I took off those rose tinted glasses,

I saw the truth.

I recognized the lies, the manipulation.

I realized my gut was right.

I was right to be scared.

I was right to be suspicious.

I was right be doubtful.

I should've ran.

But I also realized the reason I didn't,

There was something for me to learn.

All that confusion, and doubt and anxiety, I was meant to go through it.

And I learned that the right person wouldn't make me feel that way.

The right Person wouldn't lie to me or manipulate me or play games with me or make me doubt myself and my own decisions.

The right person wouldn't pretend to be someone that they're not.

The right person wouldn't give me any reason to doubt him.

The right person would do everything he could to win my trust, but not only win it, the right person would do everything in his power to keep it, and would fight for it. 

The right person wouldn't give me a reason not to trust him.

The right person wouldn't let me walk away.

And the right person wouldn't leave when things got hard.

The right person would stay by my side no matter what, because that's what you do when you love someone.

when you love someone you don't give up when things get hard.

You get mad, you argue, you talk it out.

You let conflicts make you're relationship stronger,

Not weaker.

you let them build you up, not down. 

You bandage them up and learn from them.

You don't let it break you or what y'all have.

You are going to fight, you're going to argue, 

But that doesn't mean it has to be war.

You can fight and still love each-other.

Just because you fight doesn't mean you don't love each other.

But it's the way you handle conflict that can make or break your relationship(s)

You can either let it tear ya'll apart, or let it make you stronger.

You're a team.

Even on the days when you feel like ya'll aren't.

I learned that no matter what,everything is gonna be okay. 

I learned how to tell real from fake.

And I learned who was meant for me and who wasn't.




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