Wild Hearts (A Ross Lynch Story Book Two)

Fears

|| Ross ||

It was just one of those nights. Neither of us could sleep, we were completely restless. So we did something we hadn't done in a long time.

We kept one light on and the blinds closed. I had her between my legs that were spread apart and stretched out on both sides of her, her legs were over mine and stretched out behind me. One set of my fingers slowly traced over the same invisible line over her leg while my other held hers between us.

"Come on everybody has at least one," I said in a tone close to a whisper. Lacey looked down at our hands,"The dark," she said a little quieter than I spoke.
She'd had a fear of the dark when we were kids, but I didn't know it stuck with her, or that it was her biggest fear.
"It's childish but I guess I just can't over it." She added.

I moved a little and reached over to the light on the night stand, looking over to her,"Never know until you try.."
"Ross..." She said, but I turned out the light. All light stripped out of the room, leaving us both sitting in silence.
She took a deep breath and I brought my hands back to her leg, running my fingers up to her waist.
"Are you scared?" I asked.
I could see her dark figure nodding,"A little."
When I was scared of something, talking through it and letting it out did have an effect.
"Why?"
She moved a little closer,"The not knowing. You can't see anything so it's like anything could happen but you don't know what. Once something starts to happen you might not be able to stop it."
Her description as some familiarity to it.
"When did it start?" I asked.
I couldn't see her face, but I could tell she looked up after she spoke,"I was 12." She said lowly.
I knew then where her fear originated from. The worst time in her life started with the same event that led to her fear.
I gave her hand a squeeze,"Nothing's gonna hurt you," I said,"It'll only hurt you if you think about it."
She sighed,"I can't help it."
"Yes you can," I brought my hand up to her face and held our joint hands up to see their silhouettes.

"Do you feel safe right now?" I asked while lacing our fingers in and out of each other's.
"Yeah." She said softly.
I brought my arm around her more so my hand was now on the small of her back,"Why?"
"You know why." I could hear her smile.
I started to smile as well,"Okay well tell me about it."
She sighed, again I could tell she was smiling,"Cause you. You make me feel safe." She said,"I can't say why you just always have."

She turned the tables.
"You're turn," she said,"What's your biggest fear?"
I had one major fear that summed up the rest,"Fear itself." I said.
"What do you mean?" She asked.
I continued running my fingers between her's slowly as I explained,"Well I let fear stop me from a lot of things."
"Any examples?"
"Let's just say I probably wouldn't be sitting hear with you if I didn't let my fear go for a little while." I said.
"Why?" She asked.

I went my whole life thinking about telling her how I felt. I wanted to come clean and just not care, but I had this constant fear of rejection in any way shape or form; not in the way that sounds either.
"I thought if I told you how I felt you'd distance yourself. I couldn't ruin a perfect friendship."
I felt her lips come against mine for a brief moment,"Maybe I should face my fears more, you did and you got a pretty good deal."
I smiled,"Yes I did."