The Internal Struggle.

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The Internal Struggle.


I can't explain to you why. I can't give you a reason.

I just can't do it.

I know it's unhealthy. I know it's making me sick.

But I can't.


It's not a vain reason.

It's not that I want attention.

I fucking hate the attention.

Having people stare at your every move when I'm forced to eat..


'Oh just go see a doctor.'

Why? So they can slap an eating disorder on my already full file?

So I have to see a whole team of doctors talk about diet and nutrition?

So I can hear the whole 'why are you doing this? It isn't healthy' lecture.


I almost punched someone for calling me bulimic.

I'm not fucking bulimic.

I. Just. Can't. Eat.

My body rejects everything.


I tried to eat. I tried to make everyone happy.

But all it did was make me feel sick for an entire day.

I'll go back to normal again soon.

Just need to wait it out.


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Thank you for reading!


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- Jade xx

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