The Perfect Mess

17. "Just be safe, Belle."

The thing about Edward Davis is that he can't let our relationship be normal for even a day.
Since we woke up and he saw that we were in the same bed, his face was priceless. He was so bloody shocked that he ran out of my room, leaving me gaping at him.
At breakfast, he didn't talk to me, just gave me occasional smiles. I understand he's shocked that he has shared all that with me. I can really understand how he must be feeling. But now I can't handle such behavior of his'. I wanted him to be just normal with me. I wanted him to understand that I won't judge him for whatever has happened with him.
So after breakfast, I followed him to his study.

"What do you want?" He turned around and asked, his expressions purely annoyed.

"I want you to talk to me, Edward. Don't be like this..." I said, my eyes almost filling.

Get. A. Freaking. Grip.

I blinked back my tears at my inner voice.

"I'm talking to you, ain't I?" He walked more inside his huge library, saying. His voice was so cold and distant that I was dying inside.

"Not like this.. I want you to be normal with me." I followed him stubbornly.

"How the hell can I stay normal with you?" He suddenly out bursted at me.

"You need to talk, Edward. You need to tell someone all those things which you've locked up inside that head of yours. It's killing you, it's making you go insane. I'm not telling you to share it with me, but at least tell someone about it."

I shouted with all the frustration I had. His eyes widened and he looked taken aback for a second. But then he shook his head and shut his eyes tightly. He looked lost and scared. I couldn't see him like this.
I took a step ahead and touched his shoulder. His body stiffened at my touch but then he opened his eyes. His eyes were filled.

"Do you still...love her?" I gathered courage to ask him.
His face looked ached at my question and he looked away. He kept looking at the ceiling for more than a minute when I understood his answer. I had a feeling he was looking up because his tears threatened to fall down. I felt bad for him. But I felt worse for myself.

What have I gotten myself into?

"I got my answer..." I whispered, smiling at him.

"I can't...can't love her. She killed my sister, she started dating my then best friend after that...they-they both cheated on us!" His broken voice said as he sat down on a rocking chair with a thump. He was saying all his thoughts out loud, I don't think he knew that. His face looked shocked...like he has just registered the information now.
I took a step ahead and kneeled down in front of him. Cupping his face with my palms, I made him look at me.

"You don't need to say all this if you don't want to. Let's go, Edward." I whispered again, tears rolling down my cheeks now.

"You don't know, Belle...but I feel like home with you. I feel like being what I am with you. You're so indulgent...I don't know how would I survive in this hell hole without you. I don't like it here.. You're the only girl I've trusted after my sister." He said, boring into my eyes all the time with an expression that made my cheeks flush. It wasn't a serious and painful conversation anymore, it was more like we were confessing what we felt to each other. I tightened my grip of my palms on his cheeks and smiled. He smiled back, with hope. My tears were dry now and my heart was filled with butterflies at what he said.
I moved ahead and embraced him in my arms. He hugged me back, tighter.
We felt each other calming in the hug and then pulled away.