Earth Wars

The One I Left to Die

The whole in my chest was growing as we traveled. I did not only think about revenge on the way to wherever Darin was piloting the ship. I thought about revenge, about death, life, how he died, and who did it. I thought about why. She wants what I have? But what do I have without a family?

"Pilar?" Darin asked after we had jumped into hyperspace traveling faster than the speed of light. "Pilar, I'm going to take you home. You will be safe there." Darin crouched in front of me, I was still slumped on the wall, crippled onto the cold metal grating that was the floor. Darin placed a hand on my shoulder and I shrugged him off. I don't want your pity. Anger bubbled in my chest like a stewing pot, you didn't know Felix like I did. He was only your student, you didn't watch him grow like I did. I didn't look at him, as he said he was sorry and told me we would be home soon. What was home? I didn't have one. The bitter taste of anguish coated my tongue. "Do not dwell on these feelings of anger, my child. The Dark Side feeds on those who cannot conquer their fear."

"What do I fear?" I whispered, looking into his wise eyes. "What I fear most has come true. I can't fear it any longer." I looked past him, my eyes were not focusing on anything.

"We all will lose people we love, Pilar. It is life." He sighed a heavy, weighted sigh.

"I know. I know." I said quietly, the tears sprouting in my eyes. I blinked them back, trying not to let them overflow. Darin sat before me, his presence fatherly, brotherly. He took my hands and squeezed them, he stared into my eyes and sighed again.

"I feel this too, this emotion of sadness, even regret. But there is nothing we could have done. We couldn't have stopped Isla, even if we wanted to." He took another heavy breath. "Her lust for blood is too great for her to get over. She won't stop until she -"

"Until she's dead." I interrupted, my desire to strangle the life out of my sibling eminent in my words.

"No!" Darin hissed, "she won't stop until her goal is achieved, even if she does lose her life her plans will somehow be completed. If you kill her, her dreams would then come true." He refocused my eyes, forcing me to look at him. "No one wants the evil to win." He said finally, a loud beeping started to blare all around us. I flinched at the high pitched screaming, Darin looked towards the cockpit and then back at me. He apologized again and then got off the ground. I felt the ship come out of hyperspace, we had to be on Earth now. I rocked with the ship as we landed at Base. The hatch opened and people rushed inside. I numbly rose to my feet and walked outside. I refused any assistance that was offered to me. The night was sweltering hot, the breezeless climate increasing the temperature greatly. I looked to the sky, to see the twinkling stars above me. I left him to die. I looked around the landing clearing and into the dark forest. Through the chattering of people around me, I could hear the roar of the sea beyond the trees. There I could be alone. I could hide. I blindly walked towards the still line of trees, they stood like statues as I passed them walking down a deserted path. The moon illuminated my way, it was my guide to the sandy beach. The silver light filtered through the canopy, giving everything around me a glittery shine. The night was silent as the dead, not a cricket cried, nor a bat flapped. They seemed to respect this time for Felix. I signed a defeated sigh and stopped walking to wipe the tears in my eyes. I then continued on, soon stepping onto the damp sand. I kicked off my shoes and threw off my cloak in a sudden flurry of anger. It's all my fault. If I wouldn't have gone to Kamino, he would still be alive.

I ran to the ocean, letting the frigid water run over my legs. The sudden cold was inviting, and I wanted to be surrounded by the sea, to float away from all my problems. To be with Felix. I screamed at the ocean, I demanded an answer, I cried, I ran, I splashed in the water, angrily throwing wet sand at nothing.