The Hard Times Of Samantha Lace

Chapter Twelve: THTOSL

Enjoy, Vote & Comment please! Song for today -goes well with a conversation in here- Nickelback, How you remind me. =)

   ~'I wanted them back... Thanks for reminding be how screwed up I am!~

"Samantha!" John called after me. I didn't hear him that much. "Tim, you idiot, what did you do?!" I didn't hear his answer because the only sound I began to hear was my thumping heart beating into my ears. I knew John was following me, but I didn't stop. I ran up the stairs, never slowing down and forgetting the fear of me pounding on glass.

I felt like I was having a anxiety attack. My mind wasn't really processing, but yet I understood everything. It was weird. I never felt the way I was feeling. People gave me curious glances that I ignored. I knew I wasn't getting the same effect from guys as before, I now had a tear streaked face.

I came into the halls, looking around desperately for a balcony. There had to be one somewhere, right?

"Sam!" John yelled. He still chasing me? "Go away!" I screamed back. After another five minutes of playing cat and mouse, I hid in a random room. John went past me, still thinking I was running. I let go a breath I didn't know I was holding. And it didn't make me feel better. My breathing was if I ran a marathon.

I got out of the room, my tears never stopping even if I did have a control over them. Finally. I thought when I saw two french doors. I opened them and was welcomed by a gentle breeze. "Mommy." I whispered into the wind. It was huge out here, I came to the rail and peeked over. I was on the side of the mansion.

I took my heels off and decided that I didn't want to live anymore. I didn't care at the moment that suicide was a sin. That I might go to hell even if I wasn't religious. I wanted my family back, one way or another.

I held on the the side brick where some were sticking out as a design. I gripped one and stood up on the rail. 'Seriously, your going to end your life now? At a party? This won't bring your parents back.' That little voice told me.

"I want my family back!" I yelled to no one. At that moment I started lightly sobbing, holding on tighter to the brick. I looked at the scenery in the distance. I saw the ocean and tall buildings. Hell, I even saw a faris wheel. Would I never see that again?

I took my free hand and wiped away the tears that seemed to slow down. My sister. My brothers. My parents. Am I wasting my life for something that would happen? Who knew what really happened when you died. I almost lost footing and fell back, better than falling foward. I looked over. God, that was a long way down-

"Samantha?" John asked from behind me. No, it wasn't supposed to be like this. I looked over my shoulder. John's hands was on his knee's and he was trying to catch his breath.

"I've been looking everywhere for yo- what the hell are you doing?!" John asked, realizing the situation.

"What's it look like I'm doing you moron?" I asked. John looked speechless.

"Please tell me your not doing what I think your doing." John pleaded. I shrugged, my heart rate speeding up as my foot almost slipped. Again. John slapped a hand over his forehead and he walked closer to where I was at and looked up at me with his hand still on his face.

"You didn't look like the type." Was all he said. I wanted to lunge at him at that moment.

"Seriously? That's it? No cliche, 'why would you end your life, come with me'- Some Titanic bull? Something?!" I asked in disbelief.

"Fine, you jump I jump?" John asked dramatically.

"This is not what I expected to happen if I were to go suicide." I murmured to myself.