Dripping Roses

26

The stars that spread like a blanket in the sky was the only sort of light which was visible in my room. All lights were off which left me alone in the bitter pity ness of it. The acrid feeling of heart burn and the stinging of my eyes from the excessive amount of tears which stopped flowing, somehow made me feel better. Though the constant straining of my heart were there, the memories began staining my heart.

I laid still on my bed just staring at the ceiling. Its been two days, 12 hours and 37 minutes since I saw Sydney. I missed her but also never wanted too see her in my life again. I was conflicted but my anger won.

"Emotions are the enemy!" I shouted to the empty, dark room. "Why did you make me love you?"

A new wave of sadness washed over me and a new set of tears cascaded down my face. I couldn't control the sobs that ripped through my throat so I pressed my palm to my mouth in hope to control it. Which didn't work and only made the pain less bearable. The tears streamed down my face as I remembered everything we been through. From the first time I met her till the last time I saw her.

I remembered all of our fights, kisses, everything. I remembered everything. I fell for my replica and it turned and bit me in the ass. Maybe love wasn't for me. I seriously couldn't figure it out. I fell for Sydney and she used me. Used everything I told her, for her own deeds. She went along with having James. What if she aborted him and only used that as an extra set of convincing methods to trap me? Swarms of questions clouded my mind. None made sense but that didn't stop them.

They all kept hitting me wave after wave. After every memory came a question and after very question came a distinctive memory. From the thought of her almost killing my brother and also the thought of my best friend being involved. I felt betrayed. I am now broken. My heart is shattered and its all Sydney Pearson's fault.

What plans did god have in store for me? What is the reason of this turmoil in my heart? Everything felt so surreal. One moment I am touching the most beautiful woman I ever saw, then the next moment she disappeared. Yes I hated the gray eyed beauty, but the love I have for her may never dwindle. That is what scared me. The ability to never be able to hate the woman that caused me all this pain. If someone told me a month ago that Sydney was really a spy, I would of laughed in their face and maybe kill them for insinuating such a heinous thing about my Sydney. Though look at me now. Crushed and broken. I may never return to my usual state.

I cried out once more before grabbing a pillow and covering my face. Rather rudely, my pillow was snatched from my face and I scowled at my ex- best friend and now enemy.

"You have the nerve to show up here. Actually no! You have the audacity to look me in the eye." I glared at her. At any given moment I may have killed her but now, I felt useless. I had no strength to even raise my voice. My words all came out soft as a whisper.

Guilt splashed her face but knowing Jinx she never gives up.

"Makada.."

"Stop right there!' I growled, "you have no authority to call me by my name."

"You need to understand her reasons Scar." Jinx pleaded.

"Reasons?!" I laughed dryly. "I didn't know it had reasons for making a person fall in love with you and then almost killed her brother. Wait, don't forget, also bringing her best friend into it." It took all my willpower not to hit Jinx and she knew my patience was running thin.

"She loves you Scar!" Jinx growled.

"Right! I love weed and I never betrayed it and sold myself out to the police. Did I?" I asked sarcastically.

"She didn't plan to fall in love with you. You seriously believe she would of agreed to having your child if she didn't." Jinx growled.

"It was part of the plan! Don't you see? She planned everything precisely." I stated.