Oh Joy

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You went into battle with the rest of the team and you stood next to Medic and you even had your own uniform which looked like Medic's. You even had your own lab coat, so once the battle started you charged off into battle. Then you encountered a BLU Scout but he hadn't noticed you so you got your über saw and killed him. "Vat ze?! Ze RED Medic is over zere, who killed Scout?!" BLU Medic said confused and you were a bit nervous but you calmly said "I did." BLU Medic turned around to see you with fresh blood stains on your lab coat. He laughed and said "Zey let you join und be a medic? Zat is funny." You glared at him with a death glare "Don't make me get the ham. We got more ham yesterday." (I say this to people when they annoy me) "Hmph. Zat vas chance fraü. Don't forget zat I am stronger zan you und I could easily kill you right now. If I vanted." "Are you saying you don't want to kill me?" "Nein. I vill." You smirked and ran behind him and stabbed your bone saw through his chest killing him instantly. "Doktor? NOOO!" You heard a Heavy yell and you turned around to see the enemy's Heavy staring wide eyed at you and BLU Medic's lifeless body. He ran over to BLU Medic and checked to see if he was alive "You will pay for killing Doktor." He said angrily and you ran to try and find somewhere to hide from the Heavy. You found a small hole and ran towards it and hid without making a sound and the enemy Heavy kept running but he didn't notice you. Then you climbed out and shot the BLU Heavy multiple times with your syringe gun and he fell over dead. Then you heard Soldier call for a Medic and you ran to help and healed him "Thanks (Y/N)." He said "No problem." You said and you thought about if you should try and get the intel. Then you found Medic "Hallo (Y/N)." "Hi Medic. Do you think I should try and get the intel while the BLUs are distracted?" "Hmm. Vell many vould call your success ze last time " beginners luck" und you vould not vant to press your luck. By ze vay whose blood is zat?" He asked "BLU Medic's, BLU Scout's and BLU Heavy's." "Vat happened?" "I killed them." Then a BLU Spy came behind Medic and you casually walked off like you hadn't noticed him and you crept up behind the Spy and held your bone saw against his throat and quietly said "Shh. Go to sleep." And you slashed his throat open causing a little blood to spray on Medic's lab coat and the Spy fell coughing and trying desperately to stop the bleeding and Medic turned around and saw what you had done. The enemy Spy twitched and coughed to show that he was just barely alive and you turned him on his back and lifted his shirt and got your scalpel. You made a careful incision and pulled out his spleen and presented it to Medic as a gift "Danke schön liebeling." He said and he kissed your now bloody cheek. "No problem." Then RED Scout ran by with the enemy's intel and made it back to the base and it was announced that the RED team had won again. You returned to the base holding hands with Medic and Spy came over to you "I uh, saw what happened to the BLU Spy." You weren't sure where he was going with this so you said "Okay." "That was a tad bit brutal. I can tell you're going to fit in around here." He said with a kind smile "Thanks Spy." You said. Then you went back to the infirmary to wash your bloodied uniform and Medic had placed the BLU Spy's spleen in a jar and put it on display on one of his shelves. "Vat do you think liebeling? Should ze spleen stay on zis shelf or zat one?" You thought for a moment and decided the light hits it at a good angle where it is then Medic walked over to you and looked at it from your angle and then the other side of the room "Ja you're right it does." He said and you held hands and walked off to join the rest of the team and eat. "So lass how was your first day here?" Demoman asked and for once he seemed sober. "It was good, I got a little something from the enemy Spy." "What was it?" Soldier asked "His spleen." You answered calmly and Demoman came and patted you on the back and said "Congrats. Usually we try and kill them quickly but slow works good too. So what all did you do?" "Well I met the enemy Scout and killed him, then I met the enemy Medic and killed him, then I met the enemy Heavy and ran away from him then killed him, then I found Medic and there was an enemy Spy coming behind him and I crept up behind the enemy Spy and said " Shh. Go to sleep." And slashed open his throat and then I took his spleen while he was still barely alive." "Vell zat sounds like it vas fun." Medic said "Yeah." You said and Scout quietly muttered "Oh joy, another crazy one." But you didn't hear him and you told jokes and funny stories with the rest of the team.

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