First Faith

Chapter 3: Implications

"After we fell and Salamence was hurt, you closed your eyes. What were you doing?"

Dawn straightened up on the couch attentively, "I was praying."

I paused before repeating, "Praying?"

"Yeah. I'm a Christian, remember?"

Of course I remembered. She'd brought it up in conversation several times, talking enthusiastically about churches and God and love and all things bright and wonderful that I'd tuned out, even after we'd gotten together. I tried to listen eventually, but it was something I couldn't hear. It wasn't for me.

I decided not to acknowledge her, "What were you praying?"

"For help, like you said. You said we needed help, I agreed, so I asked for help and John came there the next second."

I took a deep breath, speaking slowly as if it'd avoid hurting her feelings, "You know that was just a coincidence, right?"
"I don't believe in coincidences." Dawn replied, undeterred.

"I do."

Dawn shrugged, "Well, we already knew we believed different things. You never seemed bothered by it before."

"I'm not bothered."

Dawn looked at me straight on in the way only she could, "Right. You're not bothered."

She grabbed my hand and I sighed, "Fine, maybe I'm a little bothered."

"People can't be forced to change, you know."

"Why do you mention that?"

"Because arguing never made people change their minds or hearts and I feel like right now you're really defensive, even though there's no reason to be."

I tried to lessen my unease on the subject, but failed. I leaned my head against hers, trying to feel a sense of peace, but didn't succeed.

"Does it bother you?" I murmured into her hair, rubbing my thumb against her palm, "My beliefs?"

I heard her catch her breath in surprise, but she didn't move away, "I think I worry about it sometimes, but it's kind of weird..."
"What is?"

"I feel like you lie to yourself about what you believe." She said quietly, gripping my hand with a bit of urgency.

My free hand formed a fist and I forced the rest of my body not to react. I didn't like where this conversation was going, "You said I didn't have any reason to be defensive."

"You don't." Dawn moved her head away from mine and blinked in surprise at me. I observed how innocent her expression was, how pure, and felt a pang of annoyance at myself for accusing the least rude person on the face of the Earth of being somewhat hostile.

"Sorry." I bit the word, disliking apologizing so much in one day.

"We don't have to talk about it anymore if you don't want. That's just what I feel." Dawn said hesitantly.

"I know." I said too harshly before softening my voice, "It's a hard subject."

I could feel her dying to ask why, but she didn't push me, which I was very appreciative of.

"Would you like to go to bed? It's getting late." Dawn stood up and stretched. I watched her pale arms extend towards the sky as her face scrunched together.