More than just friends

~FEELINGS~

PART - 40
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Shehnaz didn't know where she was going. She was just running away from the person who kissed her just a second ago. She was just running far from him without looking around. Her feets were bare as she lost her all senses after the sudden kiss and hurriedly gets up to run far away from him without wearing her sandals.

Tears were cascading down from her eyes while running. After running a few minutes  she find herself at an unknown place. She didn't know in which corner of the palace she was at right now.

The place was darker than any other place of the palace but not that much darker because of the small bulb which was illuminating in the middle of the place. Shehnaz just stopped in the middle of the room without caring about the darkness. She crumble down on the floor while weeping. Her cheeks were strained with big fat tears. Soon her small sobs turned into louder one when a memory of sidharth kissing her comes infront of her eyes.  She never expected this would happen to her like this .

Kissing someone is really a intimate thing for her , she always wanted to get her first kiss from her lover not by the person who doesn't love her. If it was the old Shehnaz who loved Sidhart, she would have been very happy with this kiss but now it's not like that at all. Everything is changed. Her feelings are changed now and she was forced to do so , to change her feelings towards him.
She tried her best to move on from him in the past three years. She knows how many nights she spent crying for him, how she restrained herself to call him and talk to him. Her heart breaks into tiny pieces every night whenever she denied sidharth calls. Her fingers itched to call him and talk to him about everything , tells him that she was missing  him , missing his touches, missing his voice , missing everything about him but no she can't do it because she had to fucking move on from him.

She tried her best to move on from him by killing her every urge which tells her to go back to him. To distract her heart from Siddharth, she completely immersed herself in work. She spent her days and night in work without caring about her health and finally after so much suffering she started to move on from him. Her feelings are faded now , she doesn't love him like before. She considers him only as her bestfriend.
Than why is Siddharth doing this to her now? Why he kissed her when he doesn't feel for her like she used to do for him. He doesn't like her. Why he is doing all this with her. Why he is trying to give her fake hopes that will never be fulfilled.

Why is he once again trying to stir her heart and bring back her feelings which she has forcefully suppressed in her chest. No she won't let this happen to her. She won't let him play with her heart and for doing it she will have to go away from him again and this time she will never come back. After deciding it she vigorously wiped her tears with her trembling hands.

" Calm down shehnaz " after inhaling and exhaling deep breaths she rose up from her  place. She examined her surrounding to find the way out of this unknown place and after scanning she finds her way and moved to go back to her room as she doesn't wanted to go to back to venue where henna ritual is still going on.

On reaching her room she went to washroom and after washing off her messed henna hands she changed into comfortable pajamas. After changing she heads towards her soft bed and laid down on the bed. She tried to drift into slumber but can't able to do it because of the memory of sidharth kissing her started playing in her head like a broken cassette whenever she closes her eyes. " Just two days, then everything will be fine" after assuring this to herself she shutts her eyes in hope to get some sleep.
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Minutes passed in silence as sidharth kept staring at the wide sky with his heartbeat fastening that it literally drummed in his ear with face feeling warm , he brought his fingers to his lips stuttering out a breath.

" What the actual fuck happened right now?" He asked but ofcourse there was no one to answer him. His fingers are still caressing his lips reminiscing the moment when his rough lips grazed sana's soft feather like lips.