Butterfly Wings

Chapter 57

Toby's POV

Mike let me move in and it was finally Ethan's funeral. They pushed it off so far because he was donating his organs and they wanted to check cause of death. But it was his funeral and I wasn't going. 

I knew I wasn't going to be able to go without being on narcotics and God knows Ethan would turn in his grave if he knew I was on them. So I wasn't going. Instead I went to the coffee shop. I needed something to do. I had quit my job a while ago, but my old boss let me come whenever. So I went into the shop and was browsing the books when I saw it.

The book Ethan had wrote down all of our promises in it. I pulled it out of the slot and flipped through the book looking for his handwriting. On page 156, there it was. The raised writing of an ink pen. 

We promise to:

1. Love each other for as long as we can.

2.Have a future together.

3.Get married.

4.Have kids.

5.Travel together.

6.Learn together.

7.Discover together.

The list went on and I realized I was going to take the book. Maybe because I didn't want to share it with anyone, or because it was connected to Ethan, or maybe because I needed it. So I slipped it into my bag and left the coffee shop. 

I got into my car put the book onto the passenger seat. It slipped off and fell to the floor. I leaned down and picked it up. It had been laying on a pile of papers. I picked them up and saw it was Ethan's hospital papers. They had his heartbeats on them; the very last heartbeats he pumped through. Then I had an idea. I drove back to Mike's first though.

********

"So," I said as I jumped onto the couch next to Mike.

"What do you want?" Mike asked with a raised eyebrow.

"A tattoo." I said.

"A what?!"

"Well, you know how I found out about Sylvia before anyone else and you promised me a gift? I never got it. So now I want a tattoo." 

"Ok." Mike nodded. "Of?"

"Ethan's last heartbeats on my wrist." I said.

"Alright, let's go."

"Really?" 

"Yeah." I followed him out to the car and we headed to the tattoo pallor. 

We pulled up and I jumped out. I went in and told them what I wanted and handed them the papers. After 10 minutes of pain, it was done. I had a heartbeat on my arm and right where it flat lined, was a butterfly. 

I walked out of the shop with an earbud in my ear playing "Force of Nature." I finally understood what Ethan meant about my "Butterfly Wings". I was perfect just the way I was. I accepted my flaws and that made me flawless. I was able to be loved and Ethan showed me things about myself that I didn't know existed. Ethan loved every part of me, even the parts I hid, he uncovered them. 

I could see my "butterfly wings" all thanks to the love of my life, Ethan Thomas.

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It's over!