Butterfly Wings

Chapter 29

Toby's POV

We were finally back in school after our break. I tried to avoid Ethan for the most part. I had to see him in English and gym, but I ate lunch in the library. Mr.Collins almost had us pair up, too, but I shook my head violently. I don't think Ethan saw. I tried not to talk to any one, not even Jason. Nick smiled and winked at me and that filled me with anger. I glared at him and he hurried off with some girl. It dawned on me that I really didn't have a life outside of Ethan. I had Olivia and Seth, but without Ethan my life was quiet. I went home after work and laid flat on my bed.

"UGH!" I let out. I picked up my phone and saw that it was only 6. It was also pretty warm today for November. Das was at a horse show with Loretta, so I couldn't go see him. I decided I would go down the street to a small park. I went out to the garage and took my bike out. It would be stupid to drive there since it was only down the street, but I also felt like if I was going to go out and be a little kid, why not ride my bike there as well? I got on and pedaled to the end of my street, and then made a right onto another. The bright fall leaves shaded the street with a stained glass feel. I looked up and saw the sun peak through the trees as I moved along. I turned down another street and the hill pushed me along to the next turn, the park was right there.

It was a small park. It had a basketball court, a tiny playground, and a swing set. The basketball nets were rusted and the grass was littered with trash. The swing set had two swings with bent chain links. The playground was covered in graffiti and melted plastic from when people held lighters against the walls.

I sat on the swing and pumped my legs in and out like my mother showed me. I started out low and then got really high. I looked up at the sky, it was a clear blue with not a cloud in sight. I saw a plane fly by and heard the birds chirping happily. I closed my eyes and swung. As I went back I didn't fell anything, but when I swung forward I felt this chill through me. It was like a shuddering feeling as if I was about to fall, but I liked it. It was the same feeling I got when I saw Ethan. Or when I talked to him. Or when his arm brushed against mine, his hand on my neck when he kissed me, when I touched his soft brown hair. All of these things gave me the same shudder as if I was going to fall. I continued to swing high in the air.

But none of these things compared to when we would kiss. When I would kiss those guys at the parties, it was emotionless and I felt nothing for them. They would smell of stale cigarettes and pot. They tasted like sour alcohol. But when I would kiss Ethan, it was like fireworks went off inside of me. Bells and whistles sounded. It was like everything just stopped and I couldn't hear anything, but the sound of our beating hearts hammering together like one. The warmth of his body on me and his soft lips pressed on mine. He smelled of mint and tasted like orange soda. I laughed, but it quickly faded into sadness. I hoped I would feel that with him again, if he could ever forgive me for kissing yet another frog when I had a prince beside me.

Ethan's POV

I sat on the bleachers chugging water after practice. Jason was practicing his foul shots.

"Olivia is coming to pick me up if you wanna hang out." he said as he threw the ball and it hit the backboard.

"Nah." I said as I put my bottle down. He had Olivia. He was happy with her, while I watched Toby run around trying to avoid me. I saw her shake her head at Mr.Collins when the suggestion of us being pared up. It was like I was the Devil himself that she was repulsed by.

"Hey, can you help me with this?" he asked as he passed the ball to me. I stood on the foul line and lined up a shot. I tossed it in and it was nothing but net. That feeling of success was the feeling I got when Toby would come into the room or touch me or when I heard her talk. It was like everyone else blurred out and a center stage light shone on her and only her.

But that feeling was nothing compared to when she would kiss me. It was like her touch was silk and everyone was cheering like at a basketball game. The feel of my hands on her hips. Her hand on my jaw. She smelled like vanilla and tasted like strawberry candy. 

Just then a shriek of a girl echoed in the gym. Olivia stole the ball from Jason and tossed it in the hoop. He picked her up and swung her around. I wished I was that happy with Toby, but she was busy running from me and my vile words.

Toby's POV

I was still swinging, thinking about Ethan. I wanted so badly to make up with him, but I wasn't going to do it. I know what I did was wrong, that's why I confessed to it. But him bringing up my past, knowing that I couldn't stand it, was just evil. That's why I kept to myself in the first place. If you make friends they learn everything about you and at any moment they can pin it all on you. The person you care for the most can turn on you whenever they please. I mean you never hear of someone's enemy betraying them, it's always a friend. Ethan had done that to me. He could have punched, kicked, bit, cut, stabbed, slapped me, I wouldn't care. Those wounds would heal. But his words, his words will forever be inscribed in my head as if he had written them in stone. And in all of this, I would run to him the moment he called, because he was still the person I cared for the most. Whether or not he could turn on me, I couldn't do that to him. I finally had my person, and I wasn't going to let them just leave. Not yet, anyway.

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I don't understand, they both miss each other and want to be together, but they're both too pussy to tell each other they are sorry. Looks like they need some help from someone? I don't know what else to say since I already updated today. So, hope you liked this chapter. Bye, ILYSM!

-JMAC xoxo