Butterfly Wings

Chapter 55

Toby's POV

*2 weeks later*

I was sitting on the couch, staring out the window like I had been for last couple days. I didn't talk to anyone and I rarely ate. I stopped going to school, but Donna went to get my work so I would still pass in 2 weeks. Jason, Olivia, and Seth would call, but I didn't answer. Kate brought some of Ethan's things like the picture of me and him from his Christmas and his hoodie that I loved. 

"Hey, Toby." Chelsea said quietly. "Here's you tea." She said as she handed me a mug with steam floating off the top.

"Thanks." I whispered. 

"How are you doing?" she asked.

"Ok?" I said sipping the hot tea.

"Alright." she nodded. "Let me know if I can get you anything." she kissed my head. I sipped my tea and stared out the window again. Ethan had hurt me by dying, and it wasn't his fault. I'm sure he didn't want to die, but he did and it was killing me. I looked at everything around me and nothing brought me joy. It all remind me of him in some way and it was depressing. 

Everyday it took more strength to get out of bed, to get dressed or take a shower. I didn't want to do it anymore. I needed Ethan to live. It's like being addicted to a drug and then when that drug is gone all you want it that drug. And because you had survived so long on that drug when it's gone it's like you can't function. Ethan was my drug, and now I couldn't do anything without him. It's like I lost a limb or something. 

I put my tea on the window sill and went up to my room to take a nap. I've been getting up, staring, taking a nap, and repeating. I done this for two weeks now. I went and laid in my bed, but for the first time I couldn't sleep.

Everything was just too unbearable anymore. I couldn't do it. Life sucked and I was over it. If I couldn't be with Ethan then I didn't want to be here at all. 

I got up and went to the top of the stairs. I didn't think at all. I just moved one foot and in one swift motion I was falling down the stairs. I went down, hitting each one, but I didn't feel any pain. I heard a loud crack and my leg shot up with white hot pain. I winced as I fell down the last couple steps and when I hit the bottom, my head smacked the floor with a loud thud. My eyes fluttered shut as I heard Chelsea rush to the steps.

********

I was in a white room. Literally a white room. There was nothing in here just open space.

"Hello?!" I yelled. It echoed through the room. 

"Toby." a voice said behind me. I turned to see Ethan standing there all dressed up and normal looking.

"Ethan!" I ran to him and gave him a hug. "Oh God. Thank you!" I cried.

"Toby, you aren't dead." he said grabbing my shoulders. 

"Wh-"

"Listen, there isn't a lot of time. But I need you to move on. Don't be upset that I'm dead anymore. I can't, well I can, but I don't believe that you tried to kill yourself to be with me. Toby, you have a whole life ahead of you. I've seen it. You are going to go on and do big things. And if you try this again, Toby I will be sure to be the one to take you back."

"Ethan, what are you talking about?" I asked so confused. If I wasn't dead where was I?

"I have to go, but Toby, move on with your life. I'm gone and I won't come back. You have to go on with your life." He pulled me to him and kissed me. "I love you." 

"I love you so much." I said.

"I know." He smiled. "Now, you are going to walk out of here and never come back until you are old and gray. I will be waiting for you then and only then." 

"Ethan, I don't want to go bac-"

"Sh. You are going back." He turned me around. "Now walk." he said. I turned and gave him a confused look. "Go." he pushed me. I started to walk and the room started to disappear. As I walked a new room began to fill my vision. 

I was in a hospital bed with an IV in my arm and a cast on my leg. Donna was sitting to my right.

"You're awake." she said gleefully. "Don't ever do that again!" 

"You said that the last time I was here." I said sitting up. I sighed as I looked around the room. "Where's Chelsea?"

"Oh, well. You scared her into labor. She just gave birth to Tristan." she smiled. 

"Can I see him?" I asked. 

"That depends. Will you try to kill yourself on the way there?" She asked.

"No." I said remembering what Ethan told me. 

"Ok, let me get a wheel chair." she left the room. I'm not sure what happened with Ethan in that white room, but if it was really him, I was going to do whatever he asked. So if I wasn't going back there until I was old an gray so be it.

"Here." Donna said as she pushed the chair into the room. She helped me out of bed and into the chair and she wheeled me to Chelsea's room which was down the hall. I went into the room and there was Marc, Chelsea, and Tristan. Chelsea was holding the baby. 

"Toby." Chelsea gasped. "I was so worried." she said looking at me.

"Sorry. But at least you had him." I said gesturing to the little blue bundle in her arms.

"Yeah." She smiled. "Wanna hold him?" 

"Sure." I said as Donna pushed me closer to the bed. Chelsea handed me the baby and he looked so cute. He was just a little thing. He was so pure and innocent. Seeing him made me realize what I would have been missing out on if my plan had worked. I started to tear. I wanted things to get better. I wanted to be happy again. Ethan seemed to know what he was talking about. And he wanted me to move on with my life and be happy. And if that's what he wanted, then so did I. 

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=====================================================================================So Toby is going to get better! Yay! This story is almost over guys. It's so sad. I know you aren't happy with what is going on, but I think you will like the ending so just wait on it. Hope you liked! Check out my other books! ILYSM!

-JMAC xoxo