The Only Thing I Ever Really Loved (Corey Taylor)

Chapter 12

After that the argument was left alone and we took care of going to the store before speaking to the police. I realized a few things, one Miranda's weird pregnancy cravings drove her to think peanut butter and French fries were a good combination. Then two the cops couldn't help us without actual proof of what Patrick had been doing to us. As if my swollen jaw and the shampoo covered mess I was weren't good enough hints. Unfortunately Miranda's bruises were not counted either, so we went back to the apartment feeling drained and defeated.

I decided to keep myself busy by putting away the groceries while I could hear Corey and Miry quietly discussing what could be done about this situation now. I finished up in the kitchen, deciding that I was over being a floral smelling wreak and went to take a shower. Once I was under the stream I sighed hard, my mind going over all the new problems I had just acquired. I rested my head against the beige tiles, silently considering smacking my forehead in them out of frustration. I really was stuck in this situation whether I liked it or not, so the only thing I could think to do was just to put all my focus on Miranda and her baby. I took my time finishing up in the bathroom before getting out and dressing myself. I moved into my old bedroom while brushing my wet hair to see Miry on my laptop.

I plopped down next to her asking, "What are you up to missy?"

She chuckled a bit, which was good to hear considering what we had just gone through. Miranda turned the screen slightly in my direction replying, "I know it's kind of early, but I'm searching for baby names."

I gave my head a shake, "Nah, you're just excited. So have you found anything you like yet?"

She shrugged, "A few."

A second later she handed me the notepad that had been sitting by her foot. I scanned the page seeing a list of names.

Boys: Hunter, Skylar, Howard.

Girls: Hanley, Kasha.

"Where did you come up with something like Kasha?"

"I met a girl with the name once at a family get together and it always stuck with me. Why do you not like it?"

"No, it's not that. I've just never heard a name like that before. It's really different and I like it."

"How about the boy names?"

I made a slight face, "Eh, I'm not too sure about those. Seriously though, Skylar?"

She laughed, "Hey! It's different and cute! Sides what would you have picked? Todd? Oh or better yet Corey?"

I gave her a horrified look, "Oh my god, no! Are you insane?"

After my outburst Miranda began roaring with laughter. My attention shifted for a second when I heard the front door open, but it was fully grabbed when I heard what Sarah asked Corey.

"Corey, what is that?"

There was a pause before he responded, "What's what babe?"

"That thing on your neck."

"Oh, it's probably from the fight I got in earlier at the store."

"At the grocery? What for?"

He proceeded to explain what had happened and Sarah seemed so worried about our safety. As soon as Corey reassured her we were alright she went back to her question from a minute ago.

"But that still doesn't explain the mark on your neck. It looks like a hickie."

I felt like all the air was just sucked out of my lungs and I didn't know how I should feel in this moment. Should I feel nervous, afraid, or guilty? I mean I know that I'm the one responsible for that love bite on him. I'm responsible for the kisses and touches that graced his person just this morning.

"Why the hell would I have a hickie?" He asked, sounding like he wasn't able to believe that she was implying he'd do such a thing.

"I don't know, how about you tell me." She demanded.

"There's nothing to tell you because I haven't let anyone touch me."

My stomach twisted at his words. I can't believe I'm actually allowing myself to get upset about what he was saying. Maybe it was the fact he was trying to cover his ass. That he thought he had a right to get away with what he did.

"Why don't I trust what you're saying?"

"That's what I'd love to know! Who the hell would I be messing with Sarah? I don't have enough time to even think about cheating!"

"So you have thought about it?" She snapped.

Oh great, they were really fighting now. Miranda got up from the bed, telling me in a hushed voice that she was going to the restroom. I knew what she was really doing, arguments have always upset her a lot so she was going to distract herself or hide. I let out a small sigh as I continued to listen in.

"No! What makes you think that? I've asked you to marry me for Christ sake, isn't that enough for you? I only want you Sarah. There isn't anyone else but you."

In that second I felt sick, so Corey could only ever want me when he was intoxicated. His sober mind didn't even give me a second thought, but why should I want him to? I could never have him regardless of that. Sarah is the one he belongs to. I was in love with something I could never have, this has all been a pointless fantasy. Those kisses meant nothing, those moments we shared I stacked up to much more than what they truly were. Corey and I seemed to be meant to be friends and nothing more.

I hated how much that idea broke my heart, but what could I do? All that's left is to find a way to move on. I let out a soft groan as I pressed my fingertips to my temples, I needed to get out of here for a while. This all was getting to be a bit much. I snatched up my car keys and made my way to the front door. Neither Corey nor Sarah gave a single glance in my direction as I stepped outside.

I hurried to my vehicle and found the worst thing I could in this instance, my car engine wouldn't start. I punched the steering wheel out of irritation before deciding there was no way I was heading back in there. I guess I'm going for another walk today.