Little Concessions (Rick and Morty Fanfic)

Chapter Eleven - M. Night Shaym-Aliens!

A few minutes ago, we made our way back home for Rick and Morty to put some clothes on... and thank god!! One more minute of that and I was gonna lose my mind. Rick then brought the two of us to the park where we noticed a big stage with a drum set and a microphone. Not sure where it came from... well it's a simulation, so that's where. How big is this simulation anyway?

"Aw, geez, Rick. I-I don't know if I like this plan, you know? I mean, crowds, t-t-they-they have a tendency to make me really nervous." Morty explained as he and Rick put on big chains around his neck. I did the same, feeling a little foolish, but only I guess to fool these Zigerions.

"Morty, relax, it's just a bunch of ones and zeros out there. You're gonna be fine. Just the two of you follow my lead. Yo, dj, drop that beat!" And with that, Rick and Morty then went through the curtains on stage, I followed behind, being handed a microphone afterwards as a hip-hop beat played loudly through the speakers. Suddenly, a few individuals unexpectedly approached the stage or seemingly materialized out of nowhere, expressing their joy through enthusiastic cheers.

"Uh-oh, kids. This crowd looks too small for one of our famous rap concerts. I don't think we can perform our new song, "The recipe for concentrated dark matter," for a crowd this tiny."

"You got that right, Rick." Morty said as two large groups of people started to walk out from behind the trees from each side, that's just funny, man. Rick and Morty then walked to each side of the stage, leaving me in the center, unsure of what to do next. I'll just have to follow Rick's lead like he said for us to do. Louder cheers and applause began to almost shake the stage as if we are at a Taylor Swift concert. Then Rick and Morty walked up to each side of me once more.

"Now that's more like it! Let me hear everybody say "Hhey-oh!" Yeah!" Rick said to the audience, and they quickly obeyed and cheered more.

"Yeah, all the ladies say, "Yeah!" Come on!" Morty and I were just awkwardly dancing to the beat as Rick went wild with demands from the simulated audience, which only grew as more of them came over from out of thin air.

"Everybody over 30, do this with your hand!" He lifted his hand up and made his ring finger wiggle a little before continuing, "Everybody with a red shirt, jump up and down!" As he said this to the crowd, many who wore red shirts were jumping up and down, and others were wiggling their fingers.

"Yo, everyone whose first name begins with an L who isn't hispanic, walk in a circle the same number of times as the square root of your age times 10! All of a sudden, the crowd started to actually glitch, their audio was cutting fast, until almost immediately freezing all together.

"Run, guys! Before the system reboots!" Rick than threw his mic down and pulled us off the stage, jumping off it and running through the crowd before running back into town.

"Oh, man, Rick! W-w-w-where we running to?" Morty asked as he and I were trying to catch up to Rick. Not really something I should be doing when getting over this dumb cough.

"Out of the simulation, Morty! Normally the chamber operates like a treadmill, with the virtual world disappearing behind us and being rendered in front of us as we move through it, but while its frozen, we can get to... the edge!" He said, as everything else in front of us looked very unfamiliar, pixels, lines, then we saw something more interesting. Once we approached the edge, it became apparent that we were actually inside a massive room, confirming Rick's earlier explanation about the simulation. Following Rick's lead, Morty and I also leaped off the platform.

"Holy crap!" Morty exclaimed, looking around as I did.

"Come on, kids!" Rick said, leading us to a large open doorway, Morty and I followed him out of this room and to another. What a crazy ass simulation.

"How did we even get here? I don't remember being anywhere but in my room." I said as we ran down a long hallway full of strange humming and big wires. My first time being on an alien spaceship, but is it gonna be my first time seeing actual aliens?... No.

"Zigerion abductions are always sneaky, despite them being stupid."

"If they want you to blab about your recipe then why drag Morty and I into this?"

"Obviously to get me or Morty to tell them about the concentrated dark matter, not sure why the took you in. They must think you know the ingredients to concentrated dark matter or that you're special to me or something, which you're not by the way."

"Gee, thank you. And what if I do know the ingredients?" Rick then slowed his pace, now walking.

"Oh please, you would not know anything about concentrated dark matter, that's my thing. You don't travel through portals, you don't go into space, you're not a genius like me."

"I don't have to be a genius to know some things." I said quietly.

"Ok, shut up. Keep your eyes peeled for the central processing room. That's how we're gonna scam these idiots."

"So, hey, why do these aliens keep coming after you, Rick, if you're so much smarter than them?"

"Its an obsession for them at this point, Morty. The Zigerions have been trying to outsmart me for years, Morty. Every time they do, I'm one step ahead of them. Aha! Here we go." He said as he noticed two signs, one pointing to the right saying CPU, the other pointing to the left saying ESCAPE PODS. Oh come on. Rick then walked to the right, going to the direction of the CPU, instead of the escape pods. Once we walked through the doorway, we found ourselves in another large room filled with screens, and some type of large pillars things with glowing crystal-like items poking out of them.

"Grab as many processors as you can carry, kids. These guys aren't good at much, but they're really good at making these chips." Rick explained as he pulled out a bunch of the crystals, or chips, out of their spots. Pulling as many as he can out of their place and tossing them in a pile behind him. Morty and I did the same, I was putting them in my pockets, as Morty was putting them in his shirt.

"I've got so many, I can barely hold them all. Hah, look at- look at this!" Morty said, fooling around a little, then dropping one on the floor and shattering it.

"Don't worry about it, Morty. There's plenty of 'em you little goofball!" Rick said as he tossed a crystal at Morty's face as if its a snowball. Morty fell back and behind a pillar as he threw one back at Rick. I backed up a little bit, looks fun-ish, but I think I'm good. Must be like getting hit by big chunks of glass. After they had finished, they picked up a bunch more crystals and then we made our way out of the CPU and towards the escape pods. But we found that there were two Zigerion guards blocking the way to them. Rick took a crystal and tossed it in another direction. It shattered, causing the Zigerions to run to the noise. Once they did, we quickly and quietly ran to an open escape pod, small, but the three of us fit fine. Rick then was pressing a few buttons before finally shooting us out of the spaceship.

"That was something." I said. Rick just sat in his seat, smiling, completely satisfied with himself.

"Wow, what do you know? That was easy."

"Totes malotes, dawg." Whatever that means.

"Just kind of hard to believe, you know?"

"Believe it, Morty. And once again, I'm flying away with everything I can carry, and the Zigerions got nothing of mine."