Same but... different (Lestappen and Carlando)

Chapter 6

POV Lando:

Formation lap. I was starting right behind Carlos, P5, not too bad but I always want to give it my best and I think I could do better. We all start warming up the tyres, driving in the streets of the historical Monaco. It is quite pleasing starting so close to Carlos, I really want to have a battle with him, but I also know that overtaking on this circuit is incredibly hard, and I will have to fight a lot for it.

As the lap is almost completed, my engineer tells me that Charles is having an issue regarding the car, probably because of his accident of the day before, and that he is returning to the pit. I feel really sad for him, not being able to even start on your home race, and when you're on pole, that must be horrible. But it also means I am now fourth, and that means almost on the podium. Interesting.

We align on our personal positions, the engines resonating in the city. Red lights, 1,2,3,4,5. And lights out. I try not losing any position at the start, not being able to overtake the Spanish driver in front of me, only driver left for Ferrari in the race. We stay in the same order for a few laps, and I am starting to get desperate of staying fourth, when a terrible pit stop for Bottas happens. Some wheel nut impossible to unscrew, apparently. We are now just Max, Carlos and I and that's how we finish the race, an extraordinary feeling of happiness rushing through my veins.

After the race, the podium. I feel so proud and important on there, looking on my right and seeing how my two closest friends on the grid share this podium with me. This is amazing, and it gets even better when we open the champagne, Carlos instantly attacking me with it, and me doing the same to him. From the corner of my eye, I notice that the Dutch winner is frantically searching for someone in the crowd beneath our feet, before smiling and doing a small gesture of... reassurance? to that person. I can't see who it is though, but I have my idea on that.

As I feel someone playfully fighting me and pushing me to the side, I fight back, loving every moment spent with my ex-teammate, wanting this love and happiness to last forever. Sharing a podium with him is so amazing.

Later that day, when we finally get a moment more private, I tell him:

— We could be P1 and P2 sometime, imagine!

— I'm sure we will cariño, He says with an adorable smile.

I feel myself getting quite giggly and warm, not understanding why. I must be tired, and he's being nice so that's it. Yeah probably. But when he looks at me after, something has changed in his gaze, he looks more... determined.

— Lando?

— Yeah? What is it Carlos?

— We have this week off and I was wondering if... you had something planned, or if you wanted to go with me for a few days?

I think about it for a bit, noticing him getting all fidgety and apparently nervous.

— Ehm... I mean, I don't know, I would love to but I promised my girlfriend I would see her more and y'know, we see each other for every race weekend, while I can't really see her usually so... But if the offer is still available for our next break, then for sure!

I can see the sadness in his eyes and it makes my heart ache a little, but I know I should prioritize my personal life before him, considering we're just good friends, and we are often quite close so it's easier to spend time with him. But something in me wonders if I took the right decision, as I can't help but feel a wave of guilt taking over.

Maybe... Maybe that's because I already know how that week is going to be, filled with my girlfriend blaming me for things I haven't even done, and very little "sweet" time. But I promised... And I like her, even though it's hard sometimes. I am very lost with the decision I made, but I try to convince myself it was the right one.