That's What She Said (GxG)

TWSS 36

Cataleya Lily Abadino

The room was filled with an eerie silence, the tension in the room became almost unbearable. It was as if an invisible force field surrounded us, keeping us apart and preventing any words from escaping our mouths. Even Papa, na madalas nangunguna sa conversation, seemed to feel the heavy weight of the atmosphere and chose to remain silent.

My sister and I sat across from each other, our eyes locked in a battle of unspoken words each time, while Jupiter naman ay nasa right side ko.

Bumuntong hininga ako at inilapag ang kutsara, trying to gather the courage to break the silence. I can't stand this. Ni-isa sa kanila walang balak mag-explain.

Unable to bear the silence any longer, I mustered the courage to ask, "What's going on?"

Akala ko makakatanggap ako ng sagot mula sa kanila, but to my dismay, parehas lang sila nanatili na tahimik. Tumayo na ako sa kinauupuan ko at aalis na dapat nang hawakan ako ni Jupiter sa kamay.

"Are you done?" she asked, her voice laced with a mix of hesitation and concern. "You haven't even touched your food."

I'm not sure why, but for some reason, tinignan ko si ate. Something odd caught my attention for a short moment. Her eyes shifted, ever so slightly, towards Jupiter's hand that was still wrapped around my arm. Before I could really comprehend what I had witnessed, she diverted her gaze and took a sip of water.

Questions were buzzing through my head. How could this be? Ano ba talaga ang nangyayari? All of us were suffocated by the weight of the unsaid words that hung heavily in the air. Naguguluhan na ako sa mga inaasta nila!

Nakuha ni papa ang atensyon namin nang humugot ito ng malalim na hininga. His eyes were filled with a mix of sadness and regret. "Cataleya kailangan muna namin mag-usap," he began, his voice barely above a whisper, "ng ate mo."

So there was something bigger at play, something that had been kept hidden for far too long.

Gustuhin ko man magtanong pa hinayaan ko na lang. I am at the point where I don't want to get involved in anything. I'm tired of including myself in their world. Palagi ko na lang pinagsisiksikan ang sarili ko sa lahat.

"Let go." I whispered.

Jupiter released her grip on my arm, her eyes filled with a mixture of guilt and apprehension. "I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what?" I asked, my voice filled with displeasure.

"Why don't we tell her the truth?" My sister suddenly blurted out. She glanced at our father and then turned her gaze towards Jupiter, avoiding my questioning stare. "Right, Ashtyn?"

I couldn't hide my frustration as I looked at my sister, searching for answers. Naikuyom ko ang palad ko dahil sa tinginan nila and I hate this feeling! Ako lang ba talaga ang walang alam dito? Ugh! I despised this feeling! The feeling of being in the dark, as if I were the only one who was clueless of what was going on. Everyone else seemed to know something I didn't, which only added to my frustration.

​My mind raced, trying to piece together the fragments of information I had been given. Bigla na lang pumasok sa isip ko ang mga narinig ko kay mama no'n ng hindi sinasadya.

Ate Cassandra took a deep breath, "you're not who you think you are. You're living a lie."

The words hung in the air, heavy and full of meaning. My thoughts raced as I tried to understand the scope of what I had just heard. The room seemed to revolve as the truth set in, destroying the illusion of the life I had known.