Rob Schneider as Johnathan Tiara
"Get a hold of you're life! Does the business just not matter!?"

Rob Schneider as Johnathan Tiara"Get a hold of you're life! Does the business just not matter!?"

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Jane Lynch as Allison Tiara
"Get the hell out of my house!"

Jane Lynch as Allison Tiara"Get the hell out of my house!"

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The rest of the pogues as themselves!

Introduction

The Outer Banks, Paradise on Earth. It's the sort of place where you either have two jobs or two houses. Two tribes, one island.

All right. This is Figure Eight, the rich side of the island. Home of the Kooks. So, guess where we don't live.

And then, this is the south side or the cut. Home of the working class who make a living busing tables, washing yachts, running charters. The natural habitat of...drumroll, please......the Pogues.

That's us. John B and I met because my aunt was Bestfriends with his dad, I don't even remember how we met. We've been attached from the hip ever sense we were babies and just kinda....stuck. Then in 3rd grade we met the dumb blond JJ Maybank. All 3 of us got lunch detention for cheating on a test and we just kinda clicked after that. Then in 6th grade I met Pope. We were both on the math team and he needed friends and he was hot. So I invited him to the Pogues. Then Kie came along. I have no idea how she met John B and JJ but she invited me to her trip with Sarah. Then things went downhill but I'm still beatfriends with the both of them. Sarah knows I live in the cut. She just has no idea where and it's gonna stay like that. She keeps it a secret though.

People call us the Pogues, pogies, the throwaway fish. Lowest member of the food chain. Okay. So, the downside of Pogue life is we're ignored and neglected. But the upside of Pogue life? We're ignored and neglected, which means we do whatever we want, whenever we want. Now let's meet the pogues.

That's JJ, my best friend since the third grade.
He's about as local as they come. Latest in a long line of fishing, drinking, smuggling, vendetta-holding salt-lifers who made their living off the water. Best surfer I know. Just don't tell him I said that. Mild kleptomaniac and a future tax cheat. I've also sorta had a thing for him sense 3rd grade. He's the only person I feel....... safe with. He's saved me more than he knows. I just wish he wasn't so hard on himself.

And that's Kiara, or Kie, as we call her. When not saving turtles or listening to Marley, or getting a dolphin tattoo, she hangs out with us. I'm not really sure why, though. So, she's a rich kid, actually. Foot in both worlds. Her family owns The Wreck, this Outer Banks institution. Total cash cow with the tourists. You know, I'm not really sure how her parents feel about us. They love me because im a girl and I'm a kook. The boys all have a thing for her. I mean who doesn't like her, she's pretty, perfect body, perfect personality, rich, nice parents. Her life is perfect. You could say I'm jealous.

And that's Pope, the brains of the operation... finalist for the Lucas T. Vanderhorst Merit Scholarship. And the smartest person I know. Little bit of a weirdo. His father's this legendary character, Heyward. Anything you wanted on the island, Heyward could get for you. Now, I'm not sure Heyward knew what to make of his oddball son, but it didn't matter.
He was a Pogue, just like the rest of us. He also has the biggest crush on Kie but like way bigger than the others. He's basically my best friend. He knows I like JJ I know he likes Kie and we have a flirty relationship but it's nothing more than that no matter what.

And that's John B. He lives on an old fish shack on the marsh. The Château, as his dad used to call it. He disappeared at sea nine months ago,
looking for a shipwreck. Who disappears at sea these days? His mom split when he was 3. Since his dad disappeared his uncle is supposed to be watching him but he's never here. Three months after Big John was missing,he was officially presumed dead. John B is like a big brother to me. I love him a lot. He also has a thing for Kie but not a huge thing. I'm pretty sure he also likes Sarah but Kie and Sarah have beef so he can't actually do anything, and he's a Pogue and Sarah's the Kook princess. They would be cute together though. We goof off a lot. We spent all the time with each other when we were younger because  his dad was best friends with my aunt. She told me about the merchant and I remember some stuff but not a lot.

Then there's Sarah. She's not a Pogue but we hang out a lot so I thought I'd tell y'all about her. She's been a kook her whole life. Kie introduced us and ever sense then we got really close. Even after her and Kies fall out I still hung out with her. I go over to her house at leader once a week. It's been that way sense we met. She loves saving animals and having deep conversations on the roof. She's always had a small thing for John B but knows it would never work. Her brothers a real dick. Constantly being mean and doing drugs. After Kie left the trio we made a new one. Sarah Me and Wheezie. Yea Wheezie is in middle school but she acts mature for her age. We don't tell her everything though. I tell JJ all about my life but Sarah knows about some to, probably because her dad is in tue business and her dad is crazy, but I've never told her that.

Then there's me, Evelyn Tiara, or Eve as they call me. I joined the Pogue's because they were like me. We had lots in common and it just fit. I met JJ and JB in 3rd grade then I invited Pope and then JB and JJ invited Kie. They all think I'm a kook because when I was younger I was ashamed and I've never had to guts to tell them because then they might not like me. My mom is a drunk who is always out and hooking up with dudes. My dad found about it and decided to become an abusive asshole. My aunt is the person that cares for me, but she went missing like Big John. She went missing about 3 years ago and I still haven't signed the papers. So I have to pay rent so I work for Heyward. In my opinion I'm a better surfer than JJ but I can't show them that because then they will see my bruises I cover up with makeup, so yea they've never seen me swim or do anything with water. Well that's about it in my life. No one knows the truth and it has to stick like that.

This is it for today! I hope you enjoy!! :)

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