Chapter 20

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There I was, walking by the edge of the field on the way home, trying to find myself for what I've done to Chase. Everything's unthinkable; or maybe I'm just denying to myself this mess that I've made. I can't fathom myself and the complexity of this world. Why did I do that? I mean, it's not my intention to hurt him at all. I thought he understood because we have different set of friends; I have mine, he has his. I don't know how it came to the point that one of us has to get hurt. And in my perspective, no one has to get hurt. Well, I'd rather be the one who's suffering from internal sore than him. He doesn't deserve this and I will try to fix everything up as soon as he tells me every single bit completely.

     The next day came and I was walking by the hall with Savannah. She just kept on blabbing about Zara's new collection and to be honest, I'm quite interested with these kind of talks. Back in Manchester, I used to shop a lot with Paris. By the end of the month, we would spend our allowances by shopping denims, sheer tops, dresses, pumps and tons of other girl stuff. It's fun, I have to admit. 

     All of a sudden, my eye caught this flyer on the bulletin board. I stopped in front of it and examined the paper.

     "Swimming try outs on Friday at 1 in the afternoon and maybe you can be a part of the swimming team.  See you there!"

      "You swim?" Savannah asked and I nodded, locking my eyes on the list who signed up. "You should try out tomorrow! It's gonna be fun."

     I saw Daniela's name on the list. Wow she swims? I never thought that she does. I think I should try out for this. Meeting new people would be a pleasure, I guess. And I've always wanted to become part of a swimming team but I never tried back at my school because I was part of the school's newspaper staff. 

     I grabbed my bag, took a hold of a pen and signed up in the list. I gave out a deep sigh, not sure about what I'm putting myself into. Well, I'm just going to try; no big deal if I won't have the chance to be a part of this thing. But if ever given the chance, my dad would totally be proud. 

    Savannah patted my back and said, "Good luck on that!" and I managed to reply with a smile. Then the bell rang. We went our separate ways to go to our respective rooms. 

     It was just a typical day. The same thing just happened. It's getting really boring yet fun at the same time. Fun because of my friends. So I'm kind of hoping on this swimming thing. I think it would also be a good way to keep myself fit since I've been gaining weight these days. Totally blaming grandma's cakes. 

       It's math class, the last subject of the day and Mr. Lau is just blabbing about arcs and chords. I am supposed to listen but I'm distracted by Noelle's scribbles on her notebook which reminds me of art. I haven't made another grand painting since I got here which is quite frustrating. I miss the feeling of getting attach to a paintbrush and bunch of liquid colors that stands out whenever mixed with others. It gives me the feeling  of bliss. It's amazing how simple things keep me from being down. 

      "There goes the usual Tamia, daydreaming once again," Mr. Lau said..

      I shook my head to remove the thoughts. Wow, thanks for embarrassing me in front of the whole class. That's very much nice of you, Mr. Lau. 

     After a moment, I tried to focus on the lesson already. And in a while, the bell rang. As usual, everyone walked swiftly out of the class. Then there's me and Noelle, fixing our stuff before leaving.

     "Tomorrow's the try outs from swimming team and I heard you signed up. Am I right?" Noelle asked while she zipped her sling bag.

     "Yup!" I said as I nodded. "I'm really really nervous and at the same time, excited for it actually."

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