Lost - A Greyson Chance Love Story

Chapter 19

T A M I A ' S  P O V :)

     I just gave Greyson a peck on the cheek. I'm not quite sure why I did it but I have to admit that it felt tingly inside when my lips slowly touched his rosy skin. 

     The day went on and I just spent it with my grandmother. She taught me how to knit sweaters and bake cakes; you know, old women stuff. This kind of made me miss my mom. Whenever she goes home from work, we would do a lot of new things; things that only moms can teach and make me feel. 

     I remember back then, we used to paint together in my gallery. She taught me how to use finger painting. According to her, it's a good way of making art because it all depends to our fingers and palm. We control the hue of every color with our hand alone; we stroke every line through our skin.

     "Finger painting may be reflected with our life. Everything depends on us. It's all on how we do it. We have to be careful in doing every single strand of line to make it a wonderful piece. But sometimes, we just apply whatever color or mark without thinking how it would affect the whole painting. At the middle of the process, we'd think that it's gonna be awful but if we continue to do it, it's gonna be a beautiful masterpiece eventually."

     Those words will always be tattooed on my mind. It's a great metaphor plus, it helps me in going through this cruel world without breaking down or something. And I will continually use this as a motivation to get through everything that has been destined for me.

**

     Weeks went by and and I've been spending a lot of time in school with Noelle and others. One Saturday, we all went to Keith's humongous house and just played around in his arcade. It was fun being with them. They never failed to make me feel accompanied. After that, Savannah, Noelle and I went shopping (good thing, I already got my allowance). It's great to have them with me. They somehow fill up Paris' absence. Not that she's gone to my life okay? It's just, I miss her and thank God I have Savannah and Noelle to make me happy and contented. 

     It's a Wednesday and there are no classes because of the teachers' colloqium. And 3 weeks from now is my 16th birthday. I'm not planning a grand party at all; maybe a small gathering with my friends would do. 

     I woke up at 7 in the morning and I know, it's too early for a no-school day. A month away before my 16th birthday. Man, time should slow down; I don't want to grow a year older yet. Growing is scary. The older you are, the complicated things will get. If only I could be 9 years old forever, I would. the scariest thing that I could here that time would be "I'll tell your dad" and now I'm turning 16, the scariest thing is to hear "Your dad is gone." 

     Dad.

     I shook my head together with the thought and feeling. According to my mom, he's been going worse than ever. And it's just disappointing, at the same time, frustrating. The thought of him, faded and gone is just dismal. I'm not ready for that to happen though my mom said that chances are small for him to survive. 

     "Tamia? You there?" Grandma asked.

     "Sorry, what?" I asked. Wow, was I really that lost in the middle of my thoughts? Weird.

     "I said, are you okay? You've been thinking so much and I'm worried," she said. 

     "I'm perfectly fine, thanks for asking. Nah, I'm just umm I don't know...bothered about some stuff. Don't mind about me, I'm okay."

     "You sure?" she assured.

     "Yes. Thank you," I said with a smile. 

     After eating lunch, I went outside for a walk. It felt like the first time I got here in Edmond. The weather is neither sunny nor rainy; just clear skies. And from afar, I saw Chase walking. I said hi to him and spurted a smile on my face but then he ignored me. He just stared at me blankly and looked away.