Solve My Heart

Chapter Twenty Eight

I heard a knock on the door, brushing myself down before strolling over to open it.

Taking a deep breath as I mentally prepare myself to resist the urge to push Harris up against the wall and take her as she is.

"Evening ma'am." She said, leaning against the wall cooly.

I cocked an eyebrow at her smug demeanour, "Finally giving into your sub side Harris?"

She let out a small laugh, "Never."

"We'll see about that," I smirked.

"Gonna let me in?" She questioned.

"Yes ma'am." I mimicked jokingly, stepping aside to allow her entrance.

She made her way into the hallway, waiting for me to lead her into the living room.

 "I like what you've done with the place." She commented, taking a seat on the couch.

"Oh shit yeah I forgot you haven't actually been inside before."

She raised an eyebrow, "Am I that forgettable Lorelai?"

I rolled my eyes, "Not like that you bloody plonker."

"It's very nice." She smiled genuinely.

"Thank you."

I stood there like a lemon for a few seconds, unsure of what to do.

"Sit down Beckett."

"Okay."

I took a seat next to Toni, reaching for the remote to turn the telly on.

"Do you ever just sit and watch law and order and try to figure out what the fuck is going on?" I questioned.

I watched as a smile appeared on her face, "All the time."

"Have you seen this episode?"

She furrowed her eyebrows, "Which one is it?"

"Season 11, Episode 3," I replied excitedly. 

"I have not." An amused glint graced her eyes.

"Wanna try and solve this case?" I smirked.

"Fuck yes." She grinned.

I tried my best to pay attention to the plot but my mind kept drifting towards Toni.

What the fuck am I gonna say to her?

I invited her over to 'talk' but I haven't even begun to think about what I want to say.

Now's as good a time as ever I suppose.

I averted my gaze from the tv, studying every inch of the amazing woman that sat not even two feet away from me.

God, she's beautiful.

Every single part of her mesmerises me.

The way she twirls her hair between her fingers when she concentrates.

Her ability to come up with witty remarks on the spot.

The way the lets out a slight chuckle at my shitty jokes.

Okay, she's gotta be holding back that laugh because I am fucking hilarious.

"I hate this guy, he's such an idiot." She huffed.

God, I love you. 

Woah what?

She turned to me, her eyebrow raised in amusement, "What was that?"

"What?"

I stared at Harris absolutely mortified.

"Lorelai?"

"Antoinette?"

A smug smirk crept on her face, "Did you mean to say that out loud?"

"No?" 

"Well I'll let you sit on that for a bit." She grinned.

"Uh-huh." 

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Toni POV

What just happened?

Okay, breathe. 

She definitely did not mean to say that out loud. 

But she did.

I felt like a huge weight has just been lifted off my shoulders.

Like we were both on equal terms.

How could I not trust her?

We're on the same team at work, as friends and as partners.

I was just scared.

Scared that I trust her too much.

Scared that I had given myself to another so deeply.

And I found any excuse to destroy it.

Afraid to speak when I held it back for so long.

Afraid that if I confess, I'd break what we had built so high.

Not anymore. 

Never again.

-------------

Rory POV

I love her.

Apparently.

Well, clearly I bloody do because I just fucking said it.

I'm just lying to myself here of course I fucking love her.

There is not a single day that goes by that I don't long to be wrapped in her arms.

Consumed by an overwhelming feeling of home, adoration, and contentment.

Not to mention she's drop-dead gorgeous. 

I was pulled out of my thoughts by the sound of Antoinette's angelic voice, "Lorelai."

"Hello, yes that's me."

"I'm sorry for not trusting you." 

I sighed, waiting for her to continue.

"It's not that I don't trust you, I just... I don't trust myself."

"Care to elaborate?"

"I don't trust myself not to fuck this up so I self-sabotage. I don't do... relationships. I don't do lovey-dovey shit. I did work and home that was it. Until you. You caught me so far off guard that I didn't know how to handle it. Even now."

"Hmm."

"Tell me what you're thinking Lorelai."

"I understand. I will do everything in my power to help you feel safe in this relationship. I care about you more than I could ever even describe and I really don't want to lose you, Antoinette."

Her nervous expression changed into a giant grin, "Relationship huh?"

"I'm not letting you go, Antoinette." 

"Good, you better not."

I bit my lip, fighting the urge to smile.

"Hey, Beckett?"

"Yes, Harris?" I sighed playfully.

"I love you too." 

I lost the battle as the biggest smile spread across my face, "Je t'aime, Antoinette." 

She raised an eyebrow, a blush creeping its way up her neck, "Prepared are we?"

"Yes ma'am." I beamed.