20| Tracking the Alpha Vamp

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To kill Dick we needed a bone of a righteous mortal in the three bloods of the fallen. Cass had already donated his blood for the blood of a fallen angel. We just needed the blood of fallen humanity and the blood of of the father of fallen beasts. Bobby figured fallen humanity meant Crowley and father of fallen beasts meant an alpha. So, we had to solve that puzzle now.

To top everything off, Roman acquired Sucrocorp, which meant we could no longer trust any processed foods. Which meant no pie for Dean. Since we couldn't ask Cass about the alpha issue, we summoned Crowley instead.

"So, that's what all the 'rumble, rumble' was about," Crowley nodded after we'd explained the situation. "Who translated it for you?"

"Never mind," I dismissed him. "You gonna give us the blood or not?"

"Happily. But not quite. I'm all for chopping Dick, but I can't have you running around with a vial of my blood, now, can I? You know the sheer number of nefarious spells my enemies can use that blood for?"

"Well, when, then?" Dean growled.

"Last," the demon smirked. "After you've got all the other components. Most difficult, the angel part, I'm assuming. Given your role in the apocalypse, I can't imagine the choirboys upstairs are wetting their vestements to do you- what's the word?- a solid. Unless, of course, you've got an angel up your sleeve."

"Well, that'd be convenient, but, uh, no," I lied.

"Don't worry about it," Sam jumped in. "We'll get the angel blood one way or another. We just need you to be ready next time we call."

"Fine. Oh, here's a tip. I have it on good authority there's one alpha still among us."

"Who's authority?" Dean asked.

"Mine," Crowley replied. "Wily character, that alpha vampire. Somehow made his prison break before Cass went nuclear on the place."

I swallowed hard. I remembered the alpha vamp from back when Dean and I were pulled back in to hunting two years ago. His capture had been what led us to find out Crowley had been pulling the strings before we knew Cass was in on it, too.

"And you know this, how?" Dean queried.

"Keep your friends close, your enemies, blah, blah," Crowley waved a hand dismissively. "Needless to say, I keep tabs. He moves around quite a bit. But I have an inkling I know where to start the Easter egg hunt. Happy trails."

He vanished.

"Okay. Where, jackass?!" Dean yelled.

We all jumped as flames rose on the table. When they died down, three words had been burned into the surface.

"Hoople, North Dakota," Sam read.

"Piece of paper would have worked," Dean grumbled.

Dean left Bobby's flask in the car while we went inside of the Gas N' Sip in Hoople so we could talk without him listening in.

"He seem angry?" Sam asked.

"Angry? Of course he's angry," Dean said. "If you were Bobby, wouldn't you be?"

"But he was showing signs of fatigue, like- like fritzing?"

"No, actually, it was just the opposite. He said he never felt stronger."

"That's what I was afraid of," Sam sighed. "The stronger he gets, the closer he becomes to becoming a vengeful spirit. That's reality. We need to talk about what we're going to do with him."

I looked around as they continued to talk, clocking a man putting a crazy amount of mustard on a hot dog. There was also a woman staring blankly at a refrigerator of beer and a second man slurping a giant slushy through a straw.

"Hey," I got their attention.

"What?" Dean asked.

"He seem a little out of it to you?" I nodded to Mustard Guy.

"I- I don't know. Maybe."

"What about Paula Deen over here," I gestured to the woman.

"Yeah, they- they look like, uh..." Sam trailed off, also staring around at the people, "...like those Turducken people. It's starting."

He grabbed a can off the shelf, reading its ingredients.

"It's the corn syrup," he informed us. "Everything in the store is laced with it."

"Everything?" Dean asked worriedly. "Hey, guys, I'm gonna go in a state of toxic shock, okay? I-I... I need my road foad."

"That's what Roman is banking on," I pointed out.

"Hey. Hey," Dean grabbed a plastic pie container. "This one says natural. Th-th- that means it's safe. Right?"

I grabbed the pie from him, putting it back on the shelf.

"Hate to break it to you, hon, but corn syrup is natural, technically."

"Well, then what the hell are we supposed to eat?"

Instead of answering, I looked to Sam who just held up his basket that held water bottles and bananas.

When we got to the house that the vamps were at, we found three of them dead. The weird thing was, their heads weren't chopped off- instead, it looked like they'd been burned badly by some type of acid or something. We'd never seen anything like it.

"You know a way to kill vamps with battery acid?" Dean asked.

"Only way I know is beheading," Bobby shrugged.

"Well, something didn't agree with them," I pointed out. "Hey. Check out that wall. Something seem weird to you?"

Sam, Dean and Bobby all looked at the wall in question. It looked like it should have a door, but it didn't.

"Yeah, see if you can find a switch or a lever or something," Sam said.

"Don't need one," Bobby replied, walking through the wall.

I rolled my eyes as Sam, Dean and I started searching. Sam was the one to find it on the bookshelf behind a book entitled "How to Serve Man". When he pressed the button, the wall swung open to reveal a pink room containing Bobby and a young woman. When she saw us, she jumped to her feet as we entered. She was wearing a floral dress that looked a bit like a nightgown and hugging a teddy bear. Seeing it made me miss Maddie even more.

"Guys. Machetes," I said, realizing we all still had our weapons out.

I sheathed my machete as Sam and Dean did the same.

"Hey. Look. We're not going to hurt you. Okay?" Dean assured her, showing his teeth. "No fangs. See?"

"We just want to talk," I told her gently.

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