Only For You

XX) Nicholas- Schlecht

"You alright Mar?" I asked her. I could see a cute smile coming from her innocent face. "I'm alright now." I could tell she was scared of something, but would not admit what. "Did I ever tell you this? Du bist so schön und suß." She laughed quietly as she said that. Our eyes stared into one another's. We are spending as much time with each other because one of us could die within the next few days. Going over the border is 95% a death sentence. "No you didn't. Oh Marion!" I held her tightly -not wanting to let go. "It's going to be okay." I told her, but I could tell she didn't find that reassuring at all. The war was having adverse effects on us all. A single tear flowed down her face. "Nick, I can't bear not being able to see you again. I can't. I know we hug a lot, but can I get another hug because I don't know when..." Her voice broke and she was fully crying. "Marion, I understand everything. It's going to be alright. We both have to go over the border. We're both going to make it out alive. Anything for you Marion." She buried her head in her arm and whipped her tears. The clouds rolled in very quickly and rain began. "You tell me when you want to go." I told her and she just shook her head. The rain was surprisingly warm on my face. My hair was wet and so was hers.

"Mar... This could be the end so..." I lifted her arm off her face to reveal a broken 18 year old girl, who had been drafted into the frontlines as a pilot in the Third World War. Her eyes were clouded over with pain. I could tell her heart was throbbing. Her face looked inflamed and red. She wouldn't stop crying, so I continued to comfort her. Another Lieutenant walked over. "Is she alright?" He asked. Marion buried her head further with shame. "Yeah she's just having a hard time. I got her though. Thanks." The officer saluted me and left. "Mar?" I asked her very quietly. "Hmm." She mumbled. "Marion we have to do this. We are pilots: the strongest breed of people." I tried to reassure her, but she continued to cry. "Nick... I can't, it just hurts too much baby." She said and I was shocked that she called me baby. "Mar, come on! You've made it this far. You will not die, I promise." Her arms squeezed me tighter. "I can't let you go, Nick. I just... it hurts. My family hated me for being a pilot. They didn't want me to fly. I did anyway and I lied. You're the only... one I've ever loved. Nick, you're the only one that has loved me for who I am." Her voice broke again and she couldn't talk. "Mar, listen, you're not understanding alright. You're here, you're alive. Please focus on the good Marion." I said as I held her trembling body. "My mother died of cancer and my father passed in a work accident a year ago. I get to take that lie with me..." she tried to explain, but I interrupted, "no, Marion let's not worry about that." She looked up at me finally with red eyes. "It's my mother's death anniversary today and my father's in two days." She laughed a little when I smiled at her. "I'm so sorry, but shouldn't we not focus on that?" The rain seemingly came down harder and harder. "You know, I've always wanted to..." she said quietly in a hushed tone of voice. "Wanted to what?" I asked her back. "Fly in the rain." I covered her right cheek with my hand and placed a couple kisses on her small but perfect forehead. She finally relaxed a little and stopped crying. I held her hand as the rain soaked the apron below. "Nick..." I could tell her emotions were spiraling out of control. Ever since the draft no one has been the same. It seems as if everyone has some sort of beast locked up within themselves. From the beginning I knew that Marion does not. She just wants this to end so she can go home to New York. Her hand was around my upper back giving me a hug. "Nick." She mumbled under her breath. "Marion... you have so much potential and I don't think you get that. I mean, look at you. You've come this far, why not go a little further?" I said as I stared into her soul. She looked at me sheepishly, "alright. I just feel hurt about all this. Why does it have to be like this? I have seen things that permeate my mind to the point of excruciating pain. I wish I had myself back from six months ago. I was a totally different person, who actually was living a somewhat healthy life. Now my thoughts are not even the same as... they are far from innocent. We are shedding other people's blood, how is that morally clean? At this point my soul just hurts because I hate witnessing and carrying out the war. I just cannot see myself continuing forward in this madness. I always remember what my flight instructor told me: to not worry. At this point I do not know what to do..."

The rain hit harder and harder. Thunder crashed and the lightning flashed causing an instant mood of dread. "Mar, it's alright. I often ask myself the same thing." She shivered and I was growing a deep concern for her health. It was evident that her body was giving her such a hard time. "Let's go to the hangar okay?" I picked up her weak body off my bench and walked over to the dry aircraft hangar. "You have to wake up at 6 tomorrow to do that presentation, so do you want me to carry you back to your barrack?" I asked her. She quietly nodded and let out a shy "yes." I scooped her back up off the bench and began the five minute walk. Earlier she had informed me regarding what the military told her. She did not want the military to know what happened that fateful day. They cannot know the extent of her wounds. "Do you need another morphine shot?" I thought I would ask because it seemed like she was in a lot of pain. "Yeah, it hurts." She said very quietly. Her hair dangled over my arm and her head pressed my arm. When we came to a door I opened it and set her on the chair. I pulled a shot out of my jacket pocket and took the cap off. This pilot could be both a doctor and a pilot now. Originally I never even imagined I would be a doctor as well. "Alright Marion." She unbuttoned her middle button just so I could slip the needle through. I heard her breathe deeply. She moved her legs to the side so I could get closer to her. The medication rested in my left hand. She gave me a slow nod. I pushed the shot in. She yelped in pain. "Sorry Mar." I pushed the top of the shot inward so the medicine would go In. I pulled it out very quickly but must have bumped it because she cried in pain. After taking a second to calm down she thanked me, "thank you Nicholas. It is gravely appreciated." She stood up and we walked out. Her face was pale from her making herself sick. "Marion, you're going to pass out, so let me help you." I picked her up and we finally came to her room. I put her down, she turned and gave me a small salute. After that she walked in her room and shut the door. I turned the other way and left...