equanimity

69

"wow" jay said when she opened the door. "girl this is nicceeeee"

"not you doing that tiktok sound" i let out a little snort. "but what can i say? you're dating the biggest pop star in the world"

"you've been having the biggest ego lately" jay snickered at me. "what's up with that?"

"life has just been amazing jay" i told her. "and you know that's true. i feel amazing, everything is fucking great. like, you know i've never felt this much happiness since almost three years ago"

"i know baby" she walked up to me and placed both her hands on the sides of my head while kissing my forehead. "i'm glad you're happy, that's all that matters"

jay and i set our bags aside and laid in bed.

it's pretty late and we're both exhausted from flying.

"get your hands away from my boobs carl gallagher!" jay laughed loudly while rolling away from me.

"stop that" i playfully smacked her side. "i don't look like him!"

"yes you do!" she told me while squishing my face with her hands.

"i don't" i mumbled.

jay wrapped her arms around me and snuggled into my side.

"i can feel your piercings" i smirked.

"then suck on my t-"

"of course i will!" i grinned while lifting her shirt up. "i'll will gladly suck on your mommy milkers"

"you're so weird" jayden giggled while taking my hands out from underneath her shirt. "i love you"

"i want head"

"say you love me back!" she sucked her teeth while making a pouty face.

i ignored her and ended up ranting about my day and how my show was and the interview i had yesterday.

jay just listened while i talked and talked.

"and then- i was like 'i don't know!'" i said while throwing my arms up and let them fall back down.

i turned my head to the side and saw jay staring at my boobs.

"did you hear me?" i asked her.

"hmm, what?" she hummed out and gave me a sheepish smile. "sorry, your boobs distracted me"

-

"since we're on the topic of your relationship" my interviewer, iris, said. "what's the most embarrassing thing that's happened?"

"woah" i let out a breath and chuckled. "uh- oh my god! when jay and i were in our junior year, we would call each other bubbie. even in public, in front of our friends. shit was so cringey and embarrassing!"

"that's not embarrassing at all!" iris made a face while laughing. "i think it's pretty cute"

"oh nah" i shook my head. "we said that word religiously. we'd be like 'i love you bubbie, come here bubbie, bubbie, i miss you', just saying and thinking about it now makes me wanna cringe"

i glanced over at jay who was hiding her face.

"look at her" i pointed off set and giggled. "she knows it was embarrassing and cringey as well"

"let's get her on here" iris waved jay over. "if you want too though, it's all good if you don't"

i grinned when i saw jay coming to sit next to me.