When Talinda and James arrived back at the hotel room with their things, they both were quiet and nervous around each other. Talinda was getting tired of being so awkward around James, so she slammed her hands on the table in the room and turned towards James.
"That's it. We're talking about it, James. I'm tired of the awkward tension in the room. Tell me what's wrong. If you're ashamed of what happened last night, tell me. If you want me out of your house, tell me. If you were grossed out last night, tell me. I can't deal with awkwardness, James, I've never been good at dealing with it," Talinda stated, as James looked at her with wide eyes.
James was shocked by Talinda's outburst. He had expected that he'd have time to talk to Sirius about what had happened in the hotel room. He could tell that Talinda was angry, so he didn't want to make it any worse. He wanted advice from Sirius, but he realized that now he had to do something on his own. He had to figure things out on his own.
"Tally, I don't--I'm not sure what to--ugh! I don't know what you want me to say, Tally! What we did last night scared me! I've never done anything like that with anyone since Lily! I-I feel like I disappointed her last night by messing around with you and--" James began, before Talinda cut him off.
"Messing around?! I'm not some slag, James!" She exclaimed, as James' eyes went wide and he quickly shook his head.
"T-that's not what I meant!" He replied, feeling horrible for making the girl feel horrible about herself.
Talinda knew where the boy was coming from, but that didn't mean he had to call her a slag because he was upset with himself.
"James, I don't want to make you upset, but you know Lily would want you to finally find someone who makes you happy again. She knows you love her and always will, but she wouldn't want you to forever be alone because of her," Talinda said, walking over to the bed and sitting down next to James.
James knew she was right, but he didn't know what to do.
"C-can I talk to Sirius about this, Tally? I promise as soon as Sirius and I talk, I'll try to talk to you about this," He pleaded, and Talinda nodded defeated.
Talinda grabbed her things, as did James, and they apparated home. Sirius was waiting for them in the living room, so when he seen their faces, he knew something had happened while they were away. He wasn't sure what happened between the two, but he knew it wasn't very good.
"I'm tired. I'm going to lay down," Talinda said, leaving before anyone could say anything to her.
As soon as she was gone, James threw himself down on the sofa next to Sirius. Sirius frowned and looked at the boy sitting next to him.
"What happened?" Sirius asked, causing the boy to sigh.
"I fucked up," James murmured, and Sirius's eyebrows furrowed.
"Why? What did you do?" He asked, as James ran his hand over his face with an exasperated groan.
"Last night, Tally and I were a little too close. We snogged, and I-I may have played around with her for a little--" James began, and Sirius grinned.
"That's great, mate! You've finally found yourself someone who'll make you happy after years," Sirius said, but James shook his head.
"No, I was an arse. She-she went to give me head, but I-I pushed her away. I told her I couldn't do it anymore and left the room," He replied, causing Sirius to scowl.
"Why would you do that?" Sirius asked, crossing his arms.
"I-I didn't want to disappoint Lily, Padfoot. I feel like she'd hate me if I ever tried to be with Tally. I-I don't want to hurt Lily," James stuttered, making Sirius sigh.
"Prongs, I'm going to use some tough love right now," Sirius announced, and James nodded,"Lily is gone, mate. She's not coming back. You have been hurting yourself trying to make her happy, but she's gone, so what she wants doesn't matter anymore. You have the right to be happy, even if that means it's with another woman you finally found happiness with. Don't let your own fears take over the chance of having your own happiness. Believe it or not, I know Lily would want nothing more than for you to be happy, even if it's without her," Sirius stated, causing James to frown.
James knew Sirius was right, but it hurt for him to hear it from his own friend. James simply nodded and looked away, deciding to let himself ponder on what Sirius had said to him. Sooner or later, James knew he'd have to be happy, even if it wasn't with his Lily-flower.
"I'm going to my apartment for the night to give you time to think through everything. I'll be back tomorrow before we go to work. Moony is waiting for me," Sirius said, and James nodded once again.
James said his farewells to Sirius, before he stood up and went to check on Harry. When he walked into Harry's nursery, his eyes widened when he didn't see the boy in his small bed. He took a deep breath to keep from freaking out, before he slowly crept down the hallway and grabbed the door handle to the guest room where Talinda was staying. Sighing, James turned the handle and peeked his head into the door.
His heartbeat slowed down and he let himself calm down when he seen Harry sleeping in the bed cuddled next to Talinda. He felt himself smile slightly, but it didn't change the guilt that bubbled in his stomach. He needed time to think, and he needed time to come to terms with what he was feeling. This was one of the many moments James wished his parents were around to help him...
××××××××××××××××××××××
A/N: I hope you guys liked this chapter. I haven't updated this book in a while, but it was mostly because I've been busy with other stories. I'll try to work on this one as often as the others.
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Second Chance (J. Potter) (au)
Fanfiction*Marauders Era* Talinda Doyle was at the end of her rope. Ever since she was born, her life had never been normal. She was the only witch in her family, making her a muggle-born. Her mother absolutely despised her, and her father left when she...
